Should guys be modest too?

Hey Mary,

I think it does go both ways. I think the difference is guys are more vocal about it. Though, it is possible guys have more intense visual stimuli, though since I’ve never been a young woman, I really can’t compare – just ask questions.

And, as much as popular belief is to contrary, I think young woman are, if anything, have more intense emotions. The temptation for lust is no exception.

So, yes, because of this, I believe that young men like myself should be modest. A double standard is not acceptable. And, even though I am not the most “filled out” guy in the world, I don’t go swimming shirtless. Haha. Which is probably a good thing for the world. lol.

I actually wrote a fairly popular article about this on The Soldiers of God.

http://foreversoldiersofgod.blogspot.com/2014/12/true-modesty.html

I’m curious what everyone else thinks?

I think Paul is very clear about limiting our freedoms in order to keep a brother or sister from stumbling. That applies to guys and girls. So, the answer is yes. Modesty is no more a girl thing than it should be a guy thing.

At the same time, I think we need to remember that WE are responsible for our own thought life. Our lustful thoughts are no one’s fault but our own, so modesty isn’t our get-out-of-jail-free card to excuse our own sinful thoughts.

So, to sum it all up! Yes, guys are called to do their best to keep their sisters in Christ from stumbling just as much as girls are called to do so to guys. As Mary pointed out, usually the “guys be modest” isn’t touched on in most sermons. That doesn’t make it any less Biblical though!

I happen to have many thoughts on this. But I wrote a blogpost which covers my thoughts on this: http://gossamerlense.blogspot.com/2013/09/modesty-is-two-way-thing.html
I’d love to hear if anyone agrees with me!

In regard to clothing, the best answer I have heard to the objection that modesty teaching is given disproportionately to women is that the Bible does this as well. The two flagship verses of modesty, 1st Tim 2:9-10 and 1st Pt 3:3-4 are both addressed to women. Dannah Gresh treated this subject in her address to Cedarville University April 7th of this year. If anyone wants, you can stream the message here: http://www.cedarville.edu/Chapel/Archive.aspx

In regard to guys “generally” being more visual than women, I would simply say that the fact that you “can” be tempted when you see a guy without his shirt is why we say guys are more visual. A guy not only can but will be tempted if he were to see a girl without her shirt on. If you want to research this difference further I would recommend the book Hero or Every Man’s Battle by Fred Stoeker as he talks more about the difference between how guys and girls work in this area and how, quite frankly, girls have no frame of reference for how guys work in this dimension.

I think this is related to the difference in how God created the sexes and in the fact that men, as the initiators, were made to notice and then pursue, whereas women were made to desire to be noticed and pursued. For that reason, while a girl could be tempted through the sight of a man, it is less likely and less strong as the natural desire in that regard is less. Whereas, since men were made to notice women, it is far easier for that desire to be bent and the temptation far stronger when it is so bent because it warps a stronger appetite.

Oh, check out http://christopher164.weebly.com/blog/devotional-corner-immodest-millstone . Thanks, @christopher164:disqus! =)

grrrrrrrrrr… I typed out a comment without posting it, checked a different page, and now it’s gone. 🙁 I’ll re-type later if I can.
YES PLEASE GUYS, BE MODEST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LOL. I just wrote a comment saying pretty much the same thing. 😀

Lol that’s really weird. I hate it when I accidentally write down what other people are thinking…but great minds think alike, right?

Aww well I hope it pops up again. Sometimes the filter on the blog likes to act up. Looking forward to reading it (hopefully)!

My top pet peeve: when there is a 6 inch long explanation regulating what girls should (not) wear. and then there is one sentence addressing the guys. Ugh, it drives me crazy. I used to go to a private Christian school. When we had our spring dance, the teachers were soooooo particular about what the girls wore. It was definitely way too legalistic. It came to a point where they were literally measuring how wide the straps were on the dress and also the length of the skirt from the knee with a ruler. This one girl was wearing a really pretty dress that was not revealing in any way, the teacher came up, measured her dress length and literally made her change into one of our plaid green uniform dresses because it was a half inch off.
Anyway (sorry for that rant) I think that guys modesty doesn’t just pertain to what they wear but to how they act. So what if a guy is wearing modest clothes, he can still act extremely flirtatiously around girls. After all, our appearances isn’t our identity. Our actions have to reflect the love of Jesus Christ. So, yes guys please dress modestly, but also think about how you’re acting around your sisters in Christ as well as girls who are non believers.

Fascinating.

Should guys be modest? Yes yes yes!! I’m surprised you haven’t seen anything around this site that has pointed that out (not saying that’s your fault for not seeing it!!) – there’s actually a fair bit. There’s this post for a start: http://therebelution.com/blog/2013/06/the-other-side-of-modesty/. And, as you can see below, a lot of teens from here have written about it on their own blogs. We also can tend to stray into that topic on random posts every now and again… Anyway, I think the simple answer is yes, modesty should be considered by guys too. 🙂

Question: Should Guys Be Modest Too? Answer: Absolutely Not! The previous sentence was a joke, specifically designed to test your self-control and ability to perceive lies and discern false from fiction.

HA I figured it out. It was the word s e x. I just posted a reply to you saying “Would the word s e x do it?” (Without splitting up the letters), and it says it’s waiting for approval. 😀

But seriously, glad you figured it out! =D

Wow, twelve pack? You’ve got serious abs!

Ha, ha! Funny!

XD

Well, let’s just look at it from another angle. If we say guys don’t need to be modest, that would mean we are free to be immodest, right? That just doesn’t ring true!

Actually I wasn’t talking about gender. XD It was in a quote. Hopefully it will make more sense when the comment comes through. XD

Ooooh…someone just turned from a canoe into a ninja! 😉

Well, I will say that generally guys don’t go around wearing super-short shorts and shirts that ride down too low and stuff…we tend to be slightly more modest. 😉

=P

My pleasure! Literally!

Hey, Ruthie! Can you elaborate on what you mean by “acting like jerks”? Obviously, I have my own mental picture, but I’m curious what things jump into yours (and others) minds when you bring that into this conversation! Thanks!

I was expecting others to jump in; don’t apologize! Thanks for the input.

Good response to this question! I agree that girls can be as equally tempted as guys. Thanks for your comment!

Hey! Thank you for your comment. I was the one who sent in this question a while ago, before I decided to jump in and start commenting. I’m glad people didn’t think it was so horrible it didn’t deserve a reply. 😉
To be fair, the people preaching in the Bible were mostly men. I think the ladies probably could have told them a thing or two about the way the Roman guys looked without shirts… 😉 I do agree with what you said about how God created the sexes. However, women can be tempted strongly too – maybe not in the same way or as powerfully, but still in a way that can lead us into sin. I think that’s one thing that guys and girls need to communicate better about, because I don’t think a lot of guys realize what a problem this is for some girls.
Anyway, thanks again for your comment! It’s very thoughtful and I love being part of a site where discussions are so respectful. 😀

Good point and, judging from the replies, it would appear that I under-estimated the extent to which girls can be tempted through the eyes. I do agree that guys should be modest as they ask the girls to, I guess I was operating of the premise that it is unlikely for a guy to be immodest due to what I assumed to be a lack of interest on the part of girls. It looks like I was wrong. The primary point I was trying to address in my comment was the disproportionality in the amount of time spent talking to girls about modesty versus the amount of time spent teaching men on the same subject, as opposed to, whether or not men should dress modestly to begin with.

I will say, I have learned something new through this conversation and that is that apparently shirtless guys can be an issue. I knew that girls tended to drop their dress code at the beach and that was a problem for us but I didn’t know it went the other way around as well. Good to know.

*Quick note, my sister ( @mimeforjesus:disqus ) recommends I put smileys in to convey my tone. As an electrical engineering student having completed his freshman year of college smileys seem a little out of character, but, for what it is worth, I’m Happy 🙂 🙂 🙂 !!! (To convey that I appreciate what is being said and am not angry, perturbed, exasperated, etc.)

Thanks for your reply, as I noted below in my reply to Emigb4 ( https://disqus.com/home/discussion/therebelution/should_guys_be_modest_too/#comment-2017606970 ) I have learned something new in this conversation and that is that apparently guys can dress immodestly. My assumption was that as long as we remembered shorts we were pretty much good. ( I wasn’t actually quite that bad, I have three shirts which are tight and have sleeve lengths which showcase the biceps (not much if you are me) and, following a chapel address in which the president (of my university) made a comment about guys not wearing shirts that showed off our muscles, I stopped wearing them).

I have one quick note, however, in reply to your reply and that is in regard to you argument prefaced by the statement: “To be fair, the people preaching in the Bible were mostly men”. I would be quite cautious making an argument off such a line as you are arguing that due to an insufficiency in the authorship, the Bible does not contain a comprehensive counsel for living. I realize you probably were not thinking about it like this when you said it but such arguments are dangerous because they allow us to introduce teachings or beliefs that are not subject to the Word of God but rather compensate for an inadequacy therein.

Your point, that the Bible doesn’t say much about how guys look without shirts stands; however, the same could be said vice versa. The solution, however, isn’t to blame the authorship but to do exactly what we are doing, consult our brothers and sisters in Christ and find these sorts of things out. It does include directions to do that. 🙂

Thanks for your comments, I did not know that, while there is certainly a difference in the way it affects guys and girls, modesty can be an issue either way.

Honestly, I’ve always thought modesty should be for both girls and guys. I was hanging out with a friend of mine a while back and she mentioned that it bothered her to see immodestly dressed women, but then she said it was okay for guys to walk around without shirts. What’s the difference? There is none. Our modern culture has somehow taken things that have never been acceptable, and were in fact appalling and offensive to those in previous centuries, and made it the trend for this day and age. Go back to Victorian times, Medieval times, etc., a gentleman would never enter into a company of ladies shirtless. In the same way that scantily clad women are a distraction to men, in most cases, shirtless guys are a distraction to young women. I would advice consideration be used in the way anyone dresses to keep the purity of the thoughts of those around you intact and so you aren’t inadvertently promoting temptation.

Technically, I think everyone is a jerk at some point in there life. But usually what classifies someone as a jerk in my book -at least in the sense in which you’re talking about- is someone who plays on other’s emotions. (As a side note, that’s one of the reasons I’m against dating. It messes up your emotions.) Whether that be with their attitude, actions or the way they dress, (yes, the way people dress can have a part in playing on other’s emotions), if they’re doing it intentionally with the sole purpose of gaining attention (especially the wrong kind of attention) I consider them a jerk. And that goes for guys and girls. Aside from that definition, a jerk to me is generally someone who is full of themselves and shows a lack of respect and consideration to those around them.

Ok thanks for the clarification. I totally get it with the smileys 🙂 I have to be really careful when I comment because sometimes I mean it a certain way in my head but it doesn’t come out right when I type it, you know? Thanks for the food for thought!

I’m glad that this discussion helped then. 🙂
Yes, I realize now that that comment was pretty rash, and didn’t come off as intended. I didn’t mean to imply that the Bible was inadequate, I meant that since many who preached at the time were men, we directly get a point of view from them. Therefore, there are more passages literally about modesty of women than modesty of men. However, as you pointed out, it does tell us to consult our brothers and sisters to help each other slay free of sin. The Bible is not inadequate because of that difference then, but it is one we should be aware of. (I didn’t express that very well at all, did I? Hmm, well, lesson learned for next time.)
And no, you didn’t come off too hard, I’m glad for the help! I appreciate your concern for the soul of a complete stranger you’re typing to over the internet. 😉 😀

Good questions! I’ve wondered this myself.

lol, just realized I forgot to say that yes, I’m the one who sent in the question XD

Living in an Muslim country, I’ve had problems with modesty. At pools and hotels seeing Muslim mother sitting on the side of a pool with only her eyes showing with her husband in the pool with swim trunks (or even a speedo) an kids in tiny suits it seems totally unfair. In fact, I don’t fully enjoy my time at beaches and pools because of this and also because I feel like I’m being mean wearing my swim suit while she’s in a long dress and a head covering.
Because of this, I think one view of guys being modest is a respect thing. If they expect us to be modest it seems hypocritical for them not to be. It’s like saying, “I can do what I want but you have to do what I think you should.” If you think of modesty as a respect thing to others and to God it makes it a lot more of a priority.

Agreed. But I was wondering if you meant something more than the classic definition. Everybody hates guys that are acting like jerks. So did you have any particular behaviors in mind (beyond what Brooklyn and Abby pointed out)?

And thanks! I like the pic too!

🙂 awesome response!

Guys Can definitely be Immodest! And I would agree with everyone that already commented saying that it is a heart problem. I guess that Girls are bothered by it on different levels, but really (and here I’ll refer to the classic Pool example) I would say that a guy should be fine not wearing a shirt around other guys, but if a girl was around personally I would think the guy should wear a shirt, and respect that there are different people who might be bothered by some things that others don’t mind at all. That probably didn’t make any sense as I just wrote as I was thinking, and didn’t have any order or structure, but such is the extent of my writing skill

Excellent point!!

ABSOLUTELY!! Modesty apples to both men and women. Just like women shouldn’t walk around with no shirt on, men shouldn’t either. Yes, men are visual and women are more emotional, but even as a girl, I’m pretty visual myself and would appreciate it if guys were modest in their outward appearance. Bottom line: both men and women should be honoring God in what they wear. If we all do that there won’t be any problems, because we’re all glorifying God in what we wear!! Hope that helps!

😀 thanks!

I totally get where you’re coming from, I struggle with the same thing so here’s what I think. As Christians all of us are accountable to keep from putting extra temptations in each other’s way, so guys should be careful to. But your sin us your own, and you need to fight it with all you’ve got. It’s hard. But God is faithful and I’ll be praying for you.

You’re welcome, Mary! Welcome to the Rebelution then! Hope you have fun exploring. 🙂

You’re welcome!

Amen

Woah, you’re @mimeforjesus:disqus’s brother? Kew! And welcome to the Reb! =D

I definitely think it’s important for guys to be modest! I actually have a slightly different situation than most. I’m a guy, but I have a skin condition that necessitates that I wear a shirt while swimming (sunburns are very dangerous for me). I really don’t have a choice. That being said, I wouldn’t want to go shirtless anyway, as I find it to be pointless and unnecessary (unless you’re in a competition setting or whatever, of course). Unfortunately, I’ve found that guys seem to really forget that modesty is just as important for us as it is for girls! Guys tend to look down on me for wearing a shirt; my skin condition is the only excuse they allow! Seriously, I’ve had friends try to pressure me into going shirtless.

That really bothers me, to be honest. I believe that Christian guys should do everything we can to prevent being a stumbling block to our sisters, and should not place expectations on girls that we aren’t going to uphold ourselves. Am I saying no guys should ever go swimming shirtless? No, of course not. And if it’s all guys, I’m sure that’s fine. But at youth group lake parties and other such events with both genders present, guys really should take it more seriously than they do. I know from experience that being the only guy in a shirt is honestly really awkward. It’s like people think I’m hiding some disgusting disease or something!

Seriously guys, wearing a shirt to go swimming does not make you unmanly or weak, and it doesn’t indicate that you’re uncomfortable with your body or something. It means that you’re working to uphold a godly standard of modesty for yourself, and are attempting to avoid placing expectations on others that you aren’t living up to yourself.

Maybe we should make this a thing… #RealMenWearShirts

#ISaidTotallyTwiceInOneComment

#CommentingOnACommentOnMyComment

Really enjoy this comment; thanks! #RealMenWearShirts 🙂

Its just a society I guess but you don’t need to be like everyone else. I agree with you. Being shirtless doesn’t make me any better than anybody or wearing shirt doesn’t make you a bad guy you know. That is not how God created us.
#RealMenWearShirts

I would rather show respect than showing floppy muscles.

I have some points, most of which I think have been said, but may be relevant:
1. Modesty is more than how you dress. Flirting, at least most types, is immodest as well.
2. Personally, I’m not sure if guys are that much more visual than girls. I know I am a pretty visual person, and I’m a girl. And if that’s true, why the Calvin Klein ads?
3. It’s true that wearing less revealing clothing could be embarrassing, but that isn’t a good reason to wear a bikini or a Speedo. It should cut both ways.

Just some random thoughts.

Great input! #RealMenWearShirts

Hey, man, keeping your shirt’s on is fine! I’ve always swam with no shirt and sometimes run without one (although I’ve begun rethinking that no that I’ve seen all the girls on here say that’s not a good idea. It’s just hard to workout and run in 120 degree weather in TX), but that’s a personal decision. You’re dead right, wearing a shirt doesn’t have anything to do with how manly you are!

Okay! Thanks!

Yeah, the more I read these discussions, it’s the definition of “modesty” that is most confusing… cause it is very culturally based as to what is and isn’t “modest” in this use of the word.

I tend to agree with your opinion, “…part of modesty is trying not to
draw attention to yourself by your dress…”

As I understand what Paul wrote in 1 Timothy 2:9 “Modest apparel” as not referring to neck to ankle cover up, but in a manner unsuitable to their Rank or station in life, (in other words not appearing richer or more important than their husbands job/social position etc). When “with decency and propriety” are immediately following “Modest apparel” I think it is referring to the opposite of pride & snobbery not lust or display of flesh. Like when a ordinary tribal woman tries to dress up as the chiefs wife, she is dressing above her rank. Does that make sense?

I live in a Muslim country too currently and I’ve noticed this as well. I tend to dress the same as I did at home (which was christian college standards of modesty), but often when I’m out I’ll notice the double standard of modesty here–women will be completely covered except for their eyes and men will be going around in sleevless shirts and shorts or whatever. And I’ve thought the same thing–that it’s not fair of them to say that the women have to dress and cover themselves a certain way, but they can do what they want. But I’ve thought that modesty in any culture has been a double standard against women. That if it is going to be fair, modesty needs to start applying to men as well.

Absolutely! If I was at a pool (or the like), and I knew there were girls who struggled with it there, I wouldn’t feel right going with my shirt off.

Yes! 🙂

I agree. I’ve been thinking about this topic a lot the last two days, and it’s glaringly obvious that the closest Paul ever got to a definition of modesty is 1 Timothy 2:9, where braided hair and jewelry is condemned! So, I think in many ways we’ve skipped over what was truly meant by Paul when he wrote about modesty. Yep, makes sense!

Certainly not! It has much more to do with your attitude and your actions. I was referring here specifically toward the attitude guys tend to have toward other guys. Specifically, toward guys who choose to, for example, wear a shirt while swimming. I was referring to the cultural mindset more than the specific clothing issue.

Oops, now I look like a conceited jerk, I accidentally up-voted my own post.

Modesty isn’t always an issue of the amount of fabric on your body. It’s how you act. You can be totally covered and still send out signals of “look at me, I’m totally awesome!” It’s very important to have the right attitude before you worry about clothing.

Now about guys being modest: They definitely need to be modest. Like everyone, they need to have a modest attitude. (actually I HATE the word “Modest” from here on out, I will not be using it) They need to focus on having an attitude that is Christlike.

Now about no shirts.

Honestly, it depends on your personal convictions and where you live. For example, some guys do go around shirtless, to attract attention, that is wrong. I live in the north, so we have very few unbearably hot days (for me unbearably hot is 85, anything after that i melt). But when we do, sometimes it’s the only comfortable thing to do.

When we went to Aruba a couple years ago, it was hot. Really, really hot. (yep, i melted) Because of how hot it was, I had to wear things that i normally wouldn’t, because most houses there don’t have AC. So my family did lax a bit on our rules. For comfort’s sake.

I’m not going to say that guys should or shouldn’t wear shirts. I’m saying, What’s your motive? Why are you doing what you’re doing?
Hope this helps even a bit!!

Tut, tut, tut, Benjamin. Shame! 🙂

Just a thought from the female mind here. 🙂 If you are more physically comfortable swimming shirtless, I would consider wearing a shirt until you are in the water. If the pool/lake is deep enough, the water may cover your skin and it won’t be as immodest. Maybe??? I don’t know. Maybe this will help you and maybe it be entirely useless but I hope it helps 🙂

Just click the up-vote button again… it should un-do.
#firsttimegivingon-linetechadvice!usuallyIamtheoneasking!

Thanks! I’m a good Christian again! #I’mSuperHumble

Don’t worry, I knew what you meant!

No, I didn’t know she was notorious. Interesting. She did mention being somewhat opinionated, which I already knew, but I haven’t, as of yet, seen any of her posts except for one where she exchanged some 20 something comments about C.S. Lewis and his books.

Btw, I meant notorious as a good thing. We all love good ol’ MFJ. 🙂

While I get where you’re coming from, I don’t believe I would compromise standards for comfort. We were in Arizona in February a while back and it hit a record high of 117 degrees one afternoon, but I didn’t go out walking in a bikini (not that I would be caught dead wearing one of those anyway.) I dressed just as I always do. Sure it was a little uncomfortable, but I know I would have been a lot more uncomfortable if I had compromised for physical comfort. Of course, heat doesn’t bother me that much so 117° was bearable. I don’t think any kind of physical comfort is worth compromising your personal standards and beliefs. I hope you don’t find my comment offensive, I was just stating my own views on the subject.

As basically everyone here seems to have agreed, I think that guys should definitely look to be modest. I think I’ve always believed this, but while listening to speeches on the importance of modesty in girls, I just sort of assumed that guys already knew it, and maybe that’s why they didn’t talk about it as much (a serious lack of thought on my part, I now realize). While I don’t find shirtless guys tempting, it does make me uncomfortable, and I tend to shy away and look away from him (though perhaps this is a natural reaction from being exposed to old TV shows when modest dressing was more common?). This has even happened with my dad and my brother. Going shirtless (or even skintight shirts) and sagging pants makes my brain flare with the warning: “Back away! Not safe.” I’m not sure why this happens, but I’m not entirely ungrateful for it.

Like it has also been mentioned in several of the other comments, I think it also depends largely on who is around. I have a friend who said she and her husband have talked at length about what she would be allowed to wear in certain situations, depending on whether or not the people around her would be believers or unbelievers. I wish I could remember how she put it, but basically she could wear tank tops and things like that around unbelievers, who were more accustomed to seeing girls dress skimpily. However, Christian guys might be, and maybe even ARE, more prone to stumbling, especially if they grew up in the church. I think it’s the same thing when it’s the other way around. Girls who grow up in church aren’t used to seeing their male acquaintances strip their shirt off for swimming or a friendly game of ultimate football, and so that might cause them to stumble even if non-believing girls mayn’t. So I think that it’s VERY important for both genders to be aware of their modesty when they’re around Christian brothers and sisters, because we’re called to unity, and how can we stay unified if we’re constantly causing each other to stumble?

I didn’t mean to come across as compromising. I think I meant more of the gray areas that I just tend to stay away from because it could go either way.

I would never wear a bikini either! When we were in aruba, I just wore tank tops and shorts that are a little shorter than i usually would wear. And I NEVER wear short shorts (my mom wouldn’t let me out of my room) If it hit 117 (In February?? here it was below zero, perfect for me :P) I would just go live in the freezer. Thanks for your thoughts! I appreciate it!!

#RealMenWearShirts #ShouldBeAHashtag #TooBadIDon’tDoTwitter!

Should you not have an equal respect for the thoughts of unbelievers? In the same way that you would not wish to be a stumbling block to your brothers in Christ, should you also have a desire not to be a stumbling block to other males who come into your vicinity?

Yes, I have respect for their opinions as well, but what I’m trying to say is that they’re more used to seeing girls, like at their school or whatever, dressing less modestly than the guys at youth group are, so since the unbelievers are more used to seeing girls dressing immodestly, they might not be as prone to stumbling because of it. I’m not saying I would wear a two-piece swimsuit or spaghetti straps–there are certain standards of modesty that I have set and wouldn’t break in any situation, and they’re standards that I would expect other Christian girls to have as well. I agree that you SHOULD set standards and stick to them, but I don’t think that your standards should be, like, “I can’t wear a tank top ever in case I cause guys to stumble.” I just think that sometimes it depends a lot on your situation and who’s around you.

I see your point that even if they’re more used to it, that doesn’t mean they’re immune to it. I actually kind of go out of my way NOT to draw attention, because I’m quite introverted. I hate short shorts, so I’m not going to wear them anywhere haha. And I only wear tank tops if I’m playing sports and it’s hot out, but I’ve been wearing vests at all times since I was 11 so I don’t think I’m drawing much attention.

This might be a bit confusing, and you might be asking, “Well, why are you arguing this point if it doesn’t even apply to you?” I think that I’m thinking more in terms of, like, if I had a daughter, what would I want her to be wearing? And I had to remember that a lot of girls like to dress a tad fancier than I do (since the only thing I ever wear is a t-shirt, my vest, and either jeans or knee-length shorts), and if I had a daughter that preferred dressing better than me, what would I have to think about when setting the standards of modesty for her?

I have enjoyed our conversation though. It has been most interesting. 🙂

I’ve read the article, and I agree with it. I was merely pointing out some things that the author of the comment I was replying to seemed to misunderstand about girls. I’m sorry if what I said came across offensive.

No, you’re fine! I think maybe i should have checked over my comment too. Because it did sound kind of like that 😀 thanks for letting me know 🙂

What did Adam & Eve do about clothing?

Gen 2:25 “The man and his wife were both naked,
and they felt no shame.”

But then…

Genesis 3:7 “Then the eyes of both were opened,
and they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made
themselves loincloths.”

…sin opened their eyes to evil & THEY were
ashamed because of their nakedness.

So what I understand is
that, being naked was declared to be evil by man, not God.

“Clothes came in with
sin. Little reason have we to be proud of our clothes, which are but the badges
of our shame.” Mtt Hnry

However, after God comes into the garden, He also makes clothing
for them.

Again, I think this is
Not because God had issue with their minimal covering or garment making skills,
but because Adam, even though he had already made a covering, still wanted to
hide from God. (it can be easy for us to do the
same)

God, wanting to be with
Adam, provided the covering for them, so that their nakedness would not be an
issue that would keep them apart.

I’m not saying we walk
around in that non covered state, but we have to be careful to not put a
cultural importance on something God has not explicitly
decreed.

Maybe the focus should
be…- Matthew 6:25-34 “Do not worry
about …what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body
more important than clothes?… For the pagans run after all these things…BUT
SEEK FIRST HIS KINGDOM AND HIS RIGHTEOUSNESS, …”

I know this doesn’t directly answer your Q
on “Modesty equality” But I believe His Kingdom is more about seeking & saving the lost & this
is something we as disciples of Christ, should equally ad-dress

Yes Adam & Eve were perfect because God had made them that way, but then their disobedience separated them from Him & they tried to cover themselves, when asked by God, “where are you?”. God did not turn His back on them, it was they that hid from God. Adam’s reply was that he was naked and so he hid (even with his self made fig leaf garment). Adam had declared that being naked was bad and wrong. Adam did his best to separate himself from his nakedness by creating clothes. (didn’t work he was still ashamed) it took God (who was seeking him in the Garden) to cover Adam that Adam felt covered enough to face God.

“…And you say God has not explicitly decreed modesty…” (Not my
words) Depends on your definition of Relative Cultural Expectations of “modesty”
I totally agree “modesty has more to do with “propriety in… speech and actions”
But where I live the dress-code is far different to the Eskimos, but it is also far different to the African Himba People or Sudanese
tribes.

I understand what Paul wrote in 1 Timothy 2:9 “Modest apparel” as not referring to neck to ankle cover up, but in a manner unsuitable to their Rank or station in life, (in other words not appearing richer or more important than their husbands job/social position etc). When “with decency and propriety” are immediately following “Modest apparel” I think it is referring to the opposite
of pride & snobbery not lust or display of flesh. An example is like when an ordinary tribal woman tries to dress up as the chief’s wife, she is dressing above her rank.

I do agree, we don’t need to dress as the world does, but we can’t hide away from it either (“…in the world not of it…” etc)
I tend to agree with @Taylor B. “…part of modesty is trying not to draw attention to yourself by your dress…”
& @Liana Grace “Modesty isn’t always an issue of the amount of fabric on your body. It’s how you act. You can be totally covered and still send out signals of “look at me, I’m totally awesome!” It’s very important to have the right attitude before you worry about clothing.”
….& this is for Male & Female 🙂

Essentially I believe we are looking at the same thing modest ATTITUDE but not looking from the same angle?

Heckles Yeah! Modesty is for everyone… male and female.

I think that honestly being female we are in a difficult place. It is stumbling for me when a guy goes shirtless! But how I respond personally is that we mention it but don’t over-talk-about-it. I think that for us females it is just like when Peter was talking to Jesus in John.21
Basically Jesus was telling Peter how he was going to die and Peter caught sight of John and said “Lord what of Him?” Jeus answered and said “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me.”

In the same way God does not call us to tell others to follow Him (He is totally capable of that) But He calls us to follow Him regardless of those around us. But there is also the “Speck in your brothers eye” thing in that we are called to say something. So I think that after we have made our heart pure before God then we can mention our struggle (In Love) to the men and then we have done our part! After that it is up to God to change their hearts which will ultimately change our actions!

I agree Marissa! Actually “modesty” used to be used synonymously with humility. It’s more being modest/not showing off what we’ve got. For girls I think it’s more our bodies, for guys it’s more about how they act.
You said that well!

Hey! Just have to jump in here because this is what my dad taught on in Sunday school a couple weeks ago. If you look at the verse you referenced, Paul says it should not consist of braided hair and jewelry. He didn’t say “don’t braid your hair or wear jewelry.”
If you want to discuss this I’d love to! I always come away from discussions like this with a new perspective 🙂

And forget about my last comment, I didn’t see the discussion leading up to this… I think we agree 🙂

Well, the guys who think they’re so cool that of course they deserve the girls, are jerks who (in some strange way) can also be attractive. Does that help? Think Tony Stark…

Yes, guys with low pants are rampant here on the East Coast. Bleck!

I fear I’m to blame for that… I’m his sister.

Yes, I do. Would you like to enlighten me?
By the way, I heard that you called me “evil French toast” once… somebody has some explaining to do! If you even remember.

I’ll have to talk to my informer. And if you just looked, I’ll stop scrolling through the 1,000+ comments over there. But it’s actually entertaining to see old convos. Especially the one between Trent and Yoda!

Yep, I saw that 🙂 I just like the word notorious. (But really, I”m that well known?!)

MFJ’s bro? That’s awesome! Looks like you’re automatically popular. 😛 lol

Haha:)

Yeahhh.

Seems like we talked about this earlier… 🙂

She’s gonna make it into a big scandal and get you in jail. 😛

Oh, I just remembered, the word is notoriety 🙂

Abby, I was just wondering if you mind to share how old you are? The only reason I am asking is because you absolutely AMAZED me with your comments regarding this subject:) And I thought it would be cool to know how old you are:) If you don`t feel comfortable sharing, I totally understand, thanks!!

Well I have a question for you, why do you find yourself attracted to guys?

It made sense, and it was very wise too:)

I think that guys should think about being modest. However, just because they “should” doesn’t mean they will. Society places the most shame and pressure on girls who dress or act immodestly, so guys don’t have the same attitude towards what they wear because they haven’t been “taught” the same lesson about it by society.

Well, if it’s you & your sisters, I think it could just be genetics.

I think it’s true vise versa too. It’s like “Modesty is a girl’s issue.” “Lust is a guy’s issue.” It’s just not true. Both deal with both. Guys aren’t monsters, and girls aren’t seductresses. We’re all in the process of sanctification.

yep totally agree 🙂

I see that most people here agree that there should be modesty going both ways, for guys and girls. I think that the thing that guys should be careful of is “showing off” their masculinity. I find nothing wrong with having muscles, but if you have ripped arms you shouldn’t be wearing tank tops all the time just to show others how ripped your arms are. Someone posted earlier that modesty and humility go hand in hand and I totally agree. When considering whether something is modest or not, you have to ask the question of, “Is this humble, or am I trying to accentuate my body?” I think that this can go both ways for guys and girls.

How is it okay to show more skin around unbelieving guys? Because it’s okay if they lust? Because Christian guys have never seen a woman in a bikini before?

I think it has less to do with your level of attractiveness and more to do with respecting that which God has given you dominion over. If our bodies are the temple of the Lord, we should respect and value them. Not go around showing them off. Whether your goal is to get attention or not, you do get attention when you walk around shirtless. It isn’t always “lustful” attention, but it’s some kind of attention. And also, I don’t really get the point of walking around shirtless anyway. I mean, most guys wouldn’t walk out of a house without any pants on, but they don’t have a problem walking around without a shirt? And why would people go swimming in a public place wearing next to nothing, but refuse to walk around the streets in their underwear? (Not that I’m complaining about that last bit.) Anyway, I would say walking around without a shirt (whether you feel you’re attractive or not) is ill-advised. Especially if you’re the kind of person who expects girls to maintain a standard of modesty. But that’s just my personal opinion.