I Have Depression

Wow, this hits home for me. Earlier this year, I got over depression as well. It was the result of some traumatic experiences at home and school a few years ago. God also helped me through music, that I should have a brighter outlook. I knew it was help from Him because yesterday proved it. I had to let go of a friend that didn’t want to change. I felt the depression come back, but I was ready. I prayed that God would be with me through this and for my friend. Right after that I felt healed. The point of this long story is that even you’re at your worst, God’s always at His best. So I’ll just leave with a short but simple prayer:
God, I need You today.
I need You tomorrow.
I need You everyday,
So please don’t leave me.

As one who struggles with depression I can’t explain to you how awesome this article was! You explain so well what depression is and feels like. Thank you. Thank you a million times over. I have several friends that really just don’t understand and get angry at me for having depression and now I have a way to explain it to them. Thank you.

I too am struggling with depression, and have been doing so for years. And there are indeed positive side effects, such as being able to emphatise with other sufferers and being more dependent on God, but I don’t fully agree with you when you say it’s a blessing, a superpower even.
When I experience an episode of depression, all I see is a black nothing. I can, at times, lose all positive outlook and just become apathetic. Now sometimes, I turn to God immediately because I know I have no other hopes. But most of the time, my episodes of depression takes everything, including faith. In such moments, It’s really hard to stay realistic about things, and often I simply care too little to ask God for help, because I feel like nothing could possible help.
I respect that you try to see the up side of depression, and I think you’re really brave for doing so, but I do want to make clear there’s a whole other side of depression too; for a lot of us it is and always be a terrible curse that wrecks lives.

That’s very true, Joe. Trust me, I know.
I’m not saying that isn’t a huge part of it. The few people I have spoken to who also struggle with depression have also said that is hard to think of God. It can be very hard to pray or find their faith in the darkness. But that’s the thing: Faith is not a feeling. It’s that little voice you force out when there is nothing there, that voice that says “There is something here even though I don’t see, feel, or hear it, and because I know it is there, I will act accordingly.”

I know it’s frustrating to pray and feel like there is no one there. I find writing in a journal, saying known prayers repeatedly , or listening to Christian music can be the best way to find God in the middle of it. And sometimes you just can’t. That’s when it’s important to have friends or family members who can pray for you, because sometimes you won’t be able to pray for yourself.

I used to be where you are right now. For a long time I was that way. But then one day, I was crying in my room asking God “WHY?” I was upset. “I can’t live my life.” I prayed. His response was incredibly simple and yet mind-blowing at the same time: “Then stop living it for yourself.”

Depression is absolutely curse -if you are thinking of yourself. People with depression can’t live for themselves. There is too much pain. That is when you have to stop living for yourself and start living for God.

God Bless, Joe!

WOW! That’s incredible! I love how God has everything happen at the perfect time!
Thank you Rachel!

I’ve had depression for half of my life- I was eight when I first got it, and I’m sixteen now. It wasn’t really until a few years ago that I really understood what was going on inside me (well, as much as you can understand depression) because there were just so many stereotypes. I thought things like “real Christians don’t get depression,” “I haven’t gone through anything traumatic, so I must just be overdramatic,” “I’ll grow out of this eventually,” etc. Throughout this journey I have been suicidal (prior to getting saved five years ago- only by the power of God can I say that I have not struggled with that in the least since then), I’ve had eating disorders, and I’ve added anxiety to the list of mental problems.
A couple months ago I told my sister about my depression, and she thought I was confused, because I’m not sad all the time, so how could I have depression? Trying to explain it to her made everything finally click for me. Depression is not a disease, and it’s not a sin. It just is. At this point in my life, I don’t think I’m going to “get over” depression, and I’m okay with that, because it lets me be a blessing to people in so many ways I never dreamed of. Because people didn’t notice when something was bothering me, when I was nine I decided to notice things about other people that everyone else looks over, and, by the grace of God, I have. When I was eleven, I decided that I was never going to let anybody feel as sad or lonely as I felt at that time, and that has motivated me to make amazing friendships that I never would have before that. I’m constantly thinking about everything I’m going through and how I can turn that around and utilize it to be a blessing to others, and, in turn, a blessing to myself.
Thank you for the beautiful post that has reminded me that God is using this for a purpose in my life, Rachel! It was extremely timely. You’ll be in my prayers <3
P.S. My song was "By Your Side" from Tenth Avenue North 😉

Thank you, Rachel,
Is there any way I, personally can help my friend! Like, for you, if a friend is talking with you (with words of encouragement) does it make it less likely to be attacked?
If my friend is getting an attack while I’m there, is there anything I can do?
And also, how would I recognize if my friend is getting an attack, so I would know what to look for, not to embarrass my friend, but to help in any way possible?

Sorry about all these questions, but I really want to do everything I possibly can to help.

God bless,
– Trent

Those are good questions. Again, it’s different for everyone, and I can only speak for myself. But here’s what I would say:

First PRAY for your friend. It helps more than you can ever know.
I
can’t tell you how many times I have had a really nasty day and asked
someone to pray for me and almost immediately felt better.

Second:
understand that your friend may be in pain a lot and may not wish to
share their experience with you. Be sure to give them their space and be
respectful of their privacy.

The best way to help your friend avoid an attack is to

1) Keep them involved in community activities, even if they frequently decline.

2) Keep potentially stressful situations positive and light.

3) Don’t make a big deal about their depression

4) Tactfully find ways to compliment and point out how important your friend is in the community, without going overboard.

People who are experience depression are incredibly good at hiding it. Some, like me, want to hide it, so we don’t have to consider our situation.

It’s
hard to tell when someone is depressed. It depends on their
personality, I think, and everyone handles their struggle differently.

Look
for an unusual change in behavior. A usually quiet person might become
loud and talkative, or an outgoing person might become very quiet and withdrawn.

When you seriously ask them how they are they’ll say they’re tired.

They might exhibit nervous behaviors
They will seek out ways to be alone more…they might dodge out of groups quickly or give weak excuses to avoid going to things.

They’ll be disinterested in things that might normally excite them.

They’ll have a harder time processing things, and might appear to be slower than usual.

But again, they may be careful to hide how they feel. My friends can almost never tell if I’m depressed, because I keep it hidden. There’s not a really good way to tell.

You can help your friend by:

1) Surprising them with a random act of kindness (this actually really helps sometimes)

2) Make yourself available to them, in case they want to tell you anything

3) Check in with them occasionally to see how they are doing. Ask if they are better or worse and give them an opportunity to elaborate if they want.

4) Don’t gush about how wonderful something is or be super peppy around them. This is really annoying and frustrating for us.

5) Don’t focus on the negative or how bad they are feeling.

6)
If they choose to talk to you, don’t focus on the bad. Listen,
understand, and ask them to clarify if they can. Talking about what we
are experience can sometimes help us figure out what’s going on inside
us. Don’t press it, and if they do share, don’t focus on how horrible
everything is. Remind the individual that episodes are only temporary
and eventually it will pass. Remind them they are important to lots of people, and make sure they know they are strong.

7) Don’t make them do anything. If they don’t want to go to an event, or talk to you, let them be.

8) PRAY. That’s really the best you can do

Hope that helps!

Very eye opening. I’ve never really understood depression but this has helped. Very interesting. Thank you!

Thank you so much for sharing this! Like Hana, I’ve never understood depression fully. I’ll be praying for you!
God bless you!

Jess,

When i first read what you wrote, something has been nagging in my heart that i fell like i have to tell you.

You are amazing and loved. In fact, you are so loved that God sent down his son to die for you. I don’t know what kinds of bad stuff has happened to you, but never forget that you can have hope to face tomorrow and that no matter what happens and what happened in your life, God has a plan and he loves you.

God has a plan for your current life and for your future, and he will use you in ways that you never thought could happen.

yes, life is a battle, but we know who will win.

I don’t know if this is relevant to you, or if this is just a random “Awesome Sauce” thing that I’m having. (Hey, it’s happened before) but that’s just what i felt like i had to say.

Awesome Sauce

Thank you for saying that, Joe. I was thinking the same thing. When I am depressed there is nothing left of me. I don’t feel like I can pray and I don’t feel like God is anywhere close to me let alone hearing my prayers.

Hello Joe and Mary Anne. I just want to affirm what you’ve written here. My wife, Ana, has dealt with depression caused by Lyme Disease and other tick-borne illnesses in her brain.

For her the depression also seemed to “cut her off” from God — at least in the way she felt. She has been comforted by the many Psalms that say things like, “How long, O Lord, will you hide your face from me? How long will you be silent?” These passages have convinced us that seasons of intense suffering do not always result in intense intimacy with God — and that’s okay. God is teaching a different lesson.

We’ve also found that many of the people who report increased intimacy with God through suffering are forgetting to mention the days, weeks, months, or even years of emptiness that preceded those spiritual breakthroughs. They are trying to focus on the encouragement that God can meet us in our suffering, but end up creating the expectation that we should expect constant intimacy and spiritual vibrancy in our weakness — and that is not usually the case.

You may both enjoy this sermon by Tim Keller. It’s not about depression, per se, but it has greatly encouraged Ana these past two years:

Heman’s Cry of Darkness (Psalm 88):
http://sermons2.redeemer.com/sermons/hemans-cry-darkness

Brett makes a valid point. I look back on my struggles and marvel at the growth and the joy in God the past couple of years have brought. But it was and still is a difficult, difficult struggle.

But one day you’ll look back and realize you wouldn’t trade those struggles for anything. Those days when you want to crawl into bed and cry and never get up, those days will pass slowly. Learn to find God in those moments. That’s the hardest part. I go outside and look at the stars, or run with my dog, and it doesn’t take long before I want to laugh for joy because I am so full to the brim of happiness and peace. And those moments of perfect joy and contentment? I don’t remember a lot of those before my struggles. Depression will drive you closer to God, no matter how separated from Him you feel in those horrible moments. Trust me. There is no avoiding it. And you will be crying out in thanks and forgetting just how long it took, and how difficult it was, to get there.

It won’t happen overnight. Trust me. But always, always remember that God never forgets His people.

I have a question. How do you stop being depressed? Like, how do you get rid of it? It’s not as simple as deciding you’re not going to feel that way; I have NO control over my feelings. So what do I do? I hate feeling this way, and I want to be able to live my life properly for God, but I feel like I can’t…

i have a song too… its called “Worn” by Tenth Avenue North, I heard it by accident during one of my toughest times and the lyrics just made me cry even more…. it describes exactly how I feel:

My prayers are wearing thin
Yeah, I’m worn
Even before the day begins
Yeah, I’m worn
I’ve lost my will to fight
I’m worn
So, heaven come and flood my eyes

Let me see redemption win
Let me know the struggle ends
That you can mend a heart
That’s frail and torn
I wanna know a song can rise
From the ashes of a broken life
And all that’s dead inside can be reborn
Cause all that’s dead inside will be reborn

I love that song!!!!!! <3

Mine is "stand in the rain" by Superchick

"She never slows down.
She doesn't know why but she knows that when she's all alone, feels like its all coming down
She won't turn around
The shadows are long and she fears if she cries that first tear, the tears will not stop raining down
So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when it's all crashing down
You stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day, whats lost can be found
You stand in the rain
She won't make a sound
Alone in this fight with herself and the fears whispering if she stands she'll fall down
She wants to be found
The only way out is through everything she's running from wants to give up and lie down.
So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when it's all crashing down
You stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day, whats lost can be found
You stand in the rain"

Wow. Thats Powerful.

I know right????

And it’s so true!!!!!

Wow!! i had no clue DCB and Lecrae did music together!! *open up Youtube* Pretty cool!!!!!

Do not get me started with music. Have you heard “VIP” by manic drive yet??? A new fav!!! How about Colton Dixons “Dare to believe??” *swoon.*

Wow this is amazing. ive struggled with depression for 3 years now but it wasn’t until my brother told me about a week ago that i was depressed and i needed help that i really finally realized that its not just overdramatic or whatever else my Christian family has said to me. But reading this article has helped me to accept the fact that there IS actually something wrong with my brain. So thanks to you i have finally decided to get some help.

Offly arrogant of you, considering this is not someone’s reflections on what they believe depression looks like, but is a first hand testimony of how someone who has depression, views depression.

You have a right to your opinion, but there is no reason to slander someone else who has the same right. You can state what you believe calmly and respectfully. Since you brought up the subject, would you mind expounding upon what you believe to be a proper understanding and explanation of serious mental illnesses?

I am sorry for my reaction. I was sincerely offended and hurt by the characterization of depression here. I have lost family to depression. I have lost much of my life to it. I have been on medications, in therapy, and I have had to undergo ECT (electro-convulsive therapy) just so I can struggle to be alive. To consider depression a gift from God hurts me deeply. It hurts the treatment of those that seriously suffer in ways that are not mere soul building, but soul crushing. I do not mean to belittle the author’s suffering at all here. I apologize if I come off that way, but I do mean to criticize the author’s minimization of others’ suffering that ruins lives. If people see clinical depression as a gift instead of a disease, the treatment and help for those individuals would change for the worse.

I am happy that the author here has found a way to help herself through her own suffering, but it is wrong to assume that this is how other’s should handle it.

Depression is a complex spectrum of an illness that can range from possibly helpful reflection to near comatose inability to function.

I apologize for my overreaction. It just hurt me, but that is no excuse. I hope the best for everyone here.

I forgive you! And i’m sorry that are hurting so deeply. Do you mind if i pray for you?

I respect your opinion.

I’m sure everyone forgives the reaction, and I personally understand how you could be hurt by such a representation of a circumstance that has caused so much pain for you. I have not lost any loved ones to depression and have yet to be clinically treated, but my bout with depression has resulted in an interest in seeking out therapy and testing for psychoactive disorder. I can’t count how many times thoughts suicide, homocide, and self-harm have crept into my conscious. The later having been implemented on a number of occassions. I agree that depression is debilitating, and I don’t believe that it is a gift from God because God does not wish for us to be downcast. I do however believe that because of the sin of the world, developing a relationship with God can result in some rather depressing outcomes and reactions from the world. Jesus repeatedly made reference to the trials and tribulations his followers would have to face through time. God does give us hope through these hard times though, so we don’t have to be hopeless. We may be upset and indeed depressed. Even Jesus wept and God is pained by our refusal of His love. But we have hope in Jesus for something better in the end.

Agreed. One comment I left on this article describes two different types of depression: one physical, and one spiritual. Each type has it’s own subtypes and intricacies that must be taken into account. There is no formula for fixing depression.

True.

No worries. I pray God blesses you in your life and helps in through your trying times.

Rachel, thank you for being kind where I was not. It is encouraging.

Thank you. I feel guilty for coming out swinging. This is just a place for someone to feel free to open up and even help others. I do not want to be someone who acts the way I just did. I just ran across this at a bad time.

Hey, man, as you saw before, I also came out swinging. I do seriously regret how I addressed you.

Trent,
Believe it or not, it’s not easy for me to be kind. I would have much rather come out… what was that word? “swinging.” But i choose not to because i knew that what i saw wasn’t the whole story.

I have other random thoughts pertaining to this floating around in my head that i think i just think about them some more. 😀
RJS

To Grossed Out:

I have not read the original comment. I can pull things from
other comments to tell me what it was about. I am not here to criticize you, only to state my opinion. Please tell me if I am assuming something wrong (I very well might be). Many people have depression. I would go as far to say that
every case of depression is different. People react in different ways, see it different ways, have different severities, yet it is all under one name: depression. I say this from personal experience. Your case, your family’s
cases, my case, Rachael case, they are all very, very different. Rachael has opened up her heart on how she deals with, and sees, her depression. I’m sure you understand from experience that that is not the easiest thing to do. I know that. Rachael’s case might be less severe than your family’s. And even yours. But that doesn’t stop it from being depression. And that doesn’t stop it from being true. This might help others a lot, even though it doesn’t help you.
Maybe others who feel alone now feel that they can open up about their depression and get help where they couldn’t before. I myself have a hard time seeing it as a blessing and a superpower. It affects me too much and too severely to see it that way. I try, but I often can’t. It’s amazing that
Rachael can. That is a gift from God. Basically, I just wanted to say that we are not all against you. Or at least not seeing what you are saying. Although I don’t agree to be judgmental of the Rachael just because she likes to look at depression in a positive way, I do understand your pain and how it could be offensive. God loves you. He loves Rachael too. Her article helped someone else although it didn’t help you. Perhaps something else will help you that someone else found offensive. I don’t know. But I just have one piece of advice: Just. Keep. Moving. I often dread waking up in the morning, just because I have to do it all over again. But think of it this way instead: no matter how terrible and torturous today might have been, tomorrow has the possibility of being better. And today will end. I will be praying for you.

XOXO,
Grace

AS,
have written something similar to what you are asking for on my blog. It’s called A Recipe for Disaster.

(http://foreversoldiersofgod.blogspot.com/2014/09/a-recipe-for-disaster.html?m=1)

It talks about the things that add up to cause me to become depressed and ways to avoid these things. Now, it won’t stop depression if you avoid these things, but it will make it considerablely harder for a depression attack to set in. Let me know what you think. (°•
God bless!
– Trent

Hey Selah,

To be honest, I’m not sure I’m totally qualified to answer this. However, as someone who was depressed for the majority of my life to the point of feeling suicidal, I think I might be able to lend a few helpful ideas 🙂

Like Brett said in his answer, there are two main factors to depression: the spiritual/mental and the physical. You can’t really have one without the other – your mind and body act as one unit, each affecting and responding to the other. With this in mind, here’s some realizations and changes I’ve made in my life…or should I say, GOD made in my life, because at the time I wasn’t a totally willing or energetic participant in His rescue mission for me:

1. I have no idea what your lifestyle is, but a huge contributor to my depression was the food I ate. We live in a world where we consume crazy stuff without realizing it. This crazy stuff can sometimes have scary results. Finding out if you have a hidden allergy/sensitivity to something you’ve been consuming might be a massive trigger to how you’re feeling. Your whole body is made up of chemical reactions, and how our bodies react to certain foods is chemistry – depression can be an imbalance of chemicals in your body/mind trying to tell you something is not right…For me, gluten was one (among many!) of those chemicals that sent me to some really dark places that didn’t make sense. I had no idea it was doing that to me, and no doctor helped me find the answer – you might have to figure it out yourself through the process of elimination. It can be challenging, but it’s totally worth it!

2. Do things that scare you (in a good, healthy way! No jumping off cliffs or horror moves!) and force you to a place where you know you have nothing but God to rely on. How fitting is it that my introduction to “Do Hard Things” was also the introduction of pushing past depression and suicide for me! I’m so thankful God found a way to put that book in my hands all those years ago! Sometimes the things we love to do or dream of doing are also the things that scare us most. My advice? Depression tells you to hide and stop trying…I say get out there at every opportunity you have and find something that you really love to do – and then pour yourself into it. It might get you out of your head and as a result further from the darkness. For me, this came in the form of volunteering – whether it was at a horse/children’s therapy centre, at a soup kitchen, or preaching in South America…they were all intimidating things to do, but I loved every minute of it, and it helped me see past all the crazy in my head.

3. Last, and maybe most importantly: Pray. Keep God in the middle of all that is going on – make a conscious effort to include Him. He already knows all that you’re going through, knows you more than you know yourself. He knows the intricate pattern of chemistry that might be going a little haywire in your brain right now causing depression. He’s not going to abandon you in the middle of this. I think, also, one of the most damaging things you can do to your faith is to let guilt take over. I know how self-blame and guilt and helplessness can take over, but a key to moving on to the light is to MOVE ON. Ask for God’s help and forgiveness, and then MOVE ON in faith that you will try harder next time and that His love and forgiveness is greater than your sin (depression is NOT a sin, by the way…) or your struggles. YOU might not be able to get through depression on your own, but GOD can certainly bring you through the storm.

Hope that helped in some way! I know how complicated it all is, and how hard it can be to see straight in all of that. But I have faith that you will make it, and that God will hear your earnest prayers! Afterall, He heard and continues to hear mine! 🙂

May God bless you with peace and hope. Stay strong. Always look for Him, no matter how dark it gets!

Hello. I am the author of this article. I had not seen your comment until recently.

I understand your frustration, and I am so sorry for your losses and struggle.

As Grace pointed out, depression can range from unpleasant but tolerable to mortal and devastating. I am fortunate to have a more tolerable form of it, and do not mean to pretend that your depression is any less real.

Just like you can’t compare one person with another, I have no intention of comparing my illness to yours. We are two different people, and we suffer from depression in two very different ways. Yours is undoubtedly more intense, and I am sorry for that.

When I describe my experience, that is precisely what I am describing: MY experience. I have no intention of suggesting that ANYONE should handle their experience with mental illness based off of my article.

Mental illness is serious and unique, and deserves to be treated as such. I am not a professional, I am a witness… a witness to my story. Everyone’s story is different, and must be treated as such.

Finally, please understand that pain is never a gift from God. I feel the need to state that though I can write positively in an article meant for the average demographic, when I speak about depression with other sufferers, it is far less positive. It is painful and it is hard and it’s ugly. But if you choose to only look at the ugly and painful, that’s what your life will become. No one deserves a hard and ugly life, and each life is beautiful, even if it is sometimes hard to see. (believe me, I know it can be impossible to see sometimes)

So I choose not to let my pain define me. I intend to try and find the positive. And I thank God there is some positive to find.

Once again, I am so sorry for your losses and pain, and pray that you may find healing and peace. You have been through a lot, and I respect that.

Thank you for your inputs and perspective.

Thanks for sharing your story, Rachel! It’s made me rethink my attitude when I have “low” times of feeling depressed. While I wouldn’t pray for God to empty me of the
fruits of the Spirit (joy, peace, etc.), I’ll pray for God to empty me of things that pretend to fill me and replace God, but don’t actually do so. Your attitude is great, Rachel! It reminds me that God can work out anything and everything for good.

God bless!

I myself have struggld with depresssion. My mom refused to have me believe in the doctor’s diagnoses saying that this is normal for teens. I wasn’t going to be a stereotype.Instead she had me read scripture and figure out where all this started…..and it really helped. Depression can turn into something really nasty if you don’t begin to search for Jesus first. I’m glad my parents stepped in.And so did Jesus.

Thanks so much for this article. Last year I was in a deep depression that many times nearly ended in suicide. It is very hard to explain but very real nonetheless. Although there were a lot of factors involved in my depression I had always thought that depression was always spiritual (with very rare exceptions). I had also been sold the idea that being in depression meant that you somehow weren’t a Christian or that you were in a bad place with God. That idea was sure false – looking back I see how much God helped me through and eventually out of my depression. However, I STILL haven’t told anyone what I went through – mostly from a sort of twisted shame. (Pardon me for posting with a false name, but that shame just won’t go away.) Hopefully this article will encourage people to speak up and get help.
By the way my song is “Stay Close” by Fireflight, their music is amazing!

I love that one, too!

Songs get me through so much, too! Have you heard Matthew West’s songs? They see much more “real” than what most Christian artists put out. My favorite is “Strong Enough.”

Hey Riley thanks so much for your post. First off I’m really glad that you’ve been able to overcome that shame through Christ! My shame is a little different than most – I’m afraid that I really didn’t make that clear in the original post and for that I apologize. I really can’t provide details but some bizarre circumstances that surrounded my depression also put a rift in my relationship with my parents and that disconnect still exists. Also, they were the ones who sold me the idea that depression is shameful and I would be mortified if they somehow found out about it. So while I’d be OK sharing my story with others, I would be ashamed if somehow it circled back to them.

That being said, your post really encouraged me to be open when the time comes. I really don’t know anyone right now who would benifit from my story but I’m keeping my eyes open – and when the moment is right I really do need to share my story (and if it somehow circles around to my parents to let that fall where it falls). No it won’t be easy, but hey, we do hard things! Thanks for the challenge to be more open and I won’t forget it.

By the way I loved the song by Tenth Avenue North 🙂

No problem I enjoyed your comment. Actually me and my parents get along most of the time…it’s just in the deep stuff that the rift shows up. Regardless thanks so much for your prayers and I’ll be praying that you’ll keep putting that shame to death where it belongs 🙂
God bless and merry Christmas!

Wow! This is really inspiring.

Well this is a positive article for me. I actually went to my doctor today because I believed to be experiencing symptoms of depression. I left with the diagnosis that I do have depression. So if anybody has any advice on how to deal with this new step in my life it would be much appreciated. 🙂 Prayers would be great too!

Just remembered, one song that has really helped me is “Hope in Front of Me “-by Danny Gokey

Me too!! Wow.

Did you write this article?

Nope.

That’s what my offer is for! 🙂

Thank you very much Rachel.

This made me cry, not only because it is so true, but because I feel hopelessly worthless because of my depression, anxiety and other mental disorders or illnesses. There have been so many times I have wished that my family and friends would notice that I skip meals or sleep too much or don’t always smile during a conversation, just because I want someone to help. Everyone tells me that no one but God can help, but it’s so frustrating when all you can focus on is that feeling of anxiety like what you get right before falling down the stairs, except it doesn’t end. I want help, I don’t want to have to talk to people about it though, I always feel selfish and like I’m just complaining about my life which really isn’t that bad. I’m not trying to draw attention to myself, I just can’t be alone anymore.

Oh. This gave me another point of view. I was sure i’m not depressed and i just have a bad mood sometimes. But this made me think about it. I am depressed. And finally i know that’s not bad as i thought and i can see it as a gift from God for me. Thank you Rachel for your article. God bless you.

this point of view is so well inspired and said . the only detail is that it works only if we believe , trust and rely on God. otherwise, when you are at the bottom of the empty phase and don’t know God to rely on to feel you up, this is edge where the non christian turn to suicide or other bad issue. Thank God for having put that song on your way at the right moment so HE could reveal Himself to you. that is why i always try to have with me christian song with specific encouraging words like the one you shared as boosters ( they are my asthma pumps and my pills ). God bless you.

Thank you for this article. It’s something I’ve struggled with, too, that I am trying to overcome, and this helps a lot.

Hello Megan,
I am so sorry you are going through so much.
Firstly, you DO deserve love. You have love, even though you can’t see it. And it is absolutely not your fault that you don’t see it.
Sometimes the most loving thing to do is to let someone hurt for a little while. That may not make much sense, but I think a baby feels much the same way when its parents refuse to pick it up in order to teach it how to walk.
It is not that the baby has done something wrong, or that it’s parents do not love it very much. The baby just has to learn something new. For the baby, it’s hard. And it is scary.
But you are NEVER alone. It’s hard to see things clearly through tears, but God is there. Otherwise I wouldn’t have written this.
It’s not your fault that you don’t see Him. It’s the devil’s fault. So don’t give him the satisfaction of winning in the fight over you.
I am praying for you!

Aww:'( praying for you right now!

Rachel,
I needed to hear this so badly today. Lately my life has been a mess. I don’t know why, but I’ve been struggling with doubt. (like that God even exists, why I can’t feel Him etc) It’s morphed into a type of depression, I think. Not that i’m always negative and crying, but it just comes in waves. And people don’t seem to understand. And with my past of doubting God, I don’t even know how to see Him most of the time. But I’ve found that praise songs seems to chase some of the darkness away. And im okay for awhile, but then I fall again. Does anyone have any recommendations for what to do? About overcoming doubt and depression? I don’t know what to do anymore.

Hey Juila, I’ve delt with depression before as well (not clinical or any medically diagnosed condition), and sometimes it’s a little bit like what you’re describing.

For me, the cause was usually either trials from Satan that God was allowing, to make me stronger; or excess Stress and Anxiety.

The second kind has happened to me recently, to the point where I had to discontinue leading my website and leave a few others. That’s actually helping really well! Maybe there’s too much on your shoulders too?

As far as doubting, don’t be ashamed of it! So many people tell us to push past pur doubts and just “have faith”. That’s actually not the best way to do it. I like to advocate the opposite: “embrace your doubts until they are no more.”

In other words, if you’re doubting something, look into it! If you’re having trouble believing in anything… say “the deity of Christ”, than research the evidence for the diety of Christ, while praying that God will show you the truth, no matter if you already believe it or not. After all, if what you believe is true, you have nothing to worry about – because evidence points to the truth. If it’s wrong, however, than wouldn’t you like to know it and believe instead in what’s right? So really, as long as you’re careful and critical to spot poor logic or baseless (but convincing) lies, research can’t hurt!

I hope this helps. 😀
– trent

Haylie,
Thank you so much. I need all the prayer I can get, honestly. It’s so, so hard and it’s difficult when you just want SO badly to see Him and for it to all be okay..

Thanks!! I’ll definitely go read it, thanks for the prayers & if you wouldn’t mind continuing praying, that would be fantastic.

Your sister in Christ,

Julia

Hey Julia, I’ve struggled with doubt and depression a lot in the past too and I totally get the part about it coming in waves. Like there are times when it boils over but mostly an undercurrent running beneath everything else. With the doubts…knowing what and why you believe can really help, or if you have a friend you absolutely trust who can speak truth to you/be available to be there for you. If you’re into reading, two books (besides the Word of God) that have really helped me are Doubting by Alister McGrath and Depression: Looking Up from the Stubborn Darkness by Edward T. Welch.

Like Trent said, stress can really do a number on you and make this come on or get worse. One thing that ya might want to watch is how well you’re eating. In my case, I found out that a lot of it was due to a food allergy I had no idea I had. This probably isn’t the case for most people. But no matter who you are, eating a lot of sugar/caffeine or not getting enough sleep can be part of what is affecting you. ~AnnaGrace

Hey Julia,

It’s been forever since I’ve been on the Reb, but my email still follows this discussion and I saw your comment. First, let me just say that I’VE BEEN THERE! I know what it’s like to doubt, to wonder if God really exists, I can say that it’s definitely the scariest feeling ever! But I’ve found answers to my doubts. The number one book I would recommend, literally one of THE BEST books I’ve ever read, is “I Don’t Have Enough Faith to Be An Atheist” by Norman Geisler and Frank Turek. There is good, solid evidence out there. Don’t settle for the “I don’t know”, search for answers! “You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart.” (Jer. 29:13) Also, I would recommend looking up the resources for the apologetics class called Anchorsaway. My family started up an Anchorsaway class in our home to help teens find the answers behind why they believe what they believe. It’s an incredible class. Try going to their website and looking at some of their books: http://anchorsaway.org/.

Praying for you! Know that you’re not alone in your doubts, and that answers CAN BE FOUND.
-Riley

Julia, Thanks for your prayers as well 🙂 Sorry about the delayed response–I have been thinking and praying a lot about this and this is something I think I’m supposed to share with you from my own struggle. You said, “…when I’m trying to believe, doubt overshadows that and it’s just REALLY hard. You know? Like I want so badly to believe but it’s so hard sometimes.” Just wanted to let you know, Jesus understood that. In Mark 9 a father brought his demon-possessed, epileptic son to Him. He said to Jesus in desperation, “If You can do anything, have compassion on us and help us!” Jesus said to him, “If you can believe, all things are possible to him who believes.” And the father cried out with tears, “Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!” Talk to Jesus–tell Him about your struggle with doubt, tell Him how much you want to believe but that you can’t do it on your own. Ask Him to help your unbelief, to help you believe. Jesus answered that father’s desperate prayer. He helped that father believe and He healed his son. And sometimes, God chooses to let us struggle because He knows that at the end of that struggle you will have drawn closer to Him and you will know Him in a way you never did before. Your sister in Christ, Anna Grace

“The deepest level of worship is praising God in spite of the pain, thanking God during the trials, trusting Him when we’re tempted to lose hope, and LOVING HIM when He seems so distant and far away. At my lowest, God is my hope. At my darkest, God is my light. At my weakest, God is my strength. At my saddest, God is my comforter.” ~Anonymous

You’re not dumping it on me! We want to be here for you, honest. I felt the same way when I was there–like I was presuming on people. But I want you to know, we care.

You said you have a past of doubting God. Where do you think this started? Did something that happened or your family influence your view of God that started you in this direction? Why do you doubt His existence? Your background can affect your faith–how does your past affect your present? Sometimes figuring that out can be a good starting point in sorting this all out. Like, you said your life has been a mess lately. Do you think your doubt could be rooted in anything that’s going on?

When I was really struggling, I would call my best friend and “borrow” her faith. I trusted her, I knew that she had a deep faith in God and in the times that I felt I had no faith, I leaned on that. Your salvation or who God is doesn’t depend on the strength of your faith, but on the power of the God in whom you believe. It would probably really help if you can find someone who can help you that way. We can talk to you here but can’t be there in person.

What are you scared of? (re: “I’m so scared, honestly.”) And how are you fighting them (your doubts)?

You’re not alone. Don’t ever believe you are. You’re not the only one who has struggled with this, even though it feels like it sometimes. I have. Other Christians historically have. Other people on this blog have. And there is light at the end of the tunnel, even though you can’t see it right now! We’ve found it–we’ve come through it. And even when you can’t feel Him, God is there. Our enemy wants to isolate you and take you down; don’t let him! You reached out to us; please reach out to people around you too.

In your first comment you said, “I don’t even know how to see Him [God] most of the time.” Can I tell you something, sometimes I don’t either! I feel like I barely know Him sometimes, even though I grew up in the church. But I do want to know Him more. Don’t give up! It may seem like you’ll never find Him, but He promises, “You will seek for Me and you will find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart.” (Jeremiah 29:13)

Riley’s praying for you, Trent’s praying for you, Haylie’s praying for you, I’m praying for you, and I have about a dozen other people praying for you over here. You are not alone. Your sister in Christ, AnnaGrace

I can really identify with the feeling like you “inherited” your faith. I believed it because everyone around me believed it, but when I was 15 I started questioning everything I believed in. Did God really exist? Was this all true? I was scared, just like you are, but I didn’t go to anyone because I had been held up by people in my church so long as a picture of a good Christian kid that I felt immensely guilty for doubting and was sure they would condemn me if they knew what I was struggling with. So I kind of played along. I kept on acting like a “Christian”, going to church and youth group, keeping up the face. But in reality, for about two years I became an atheist/agnostic. I stopped believing in God. I couldn’t prove He existed, no matter how much the evidence added up in His favor. No matter how much I wanted to believe, there was always that uncertainty. I remember saying to myself, “There’s no way other religions are real. If anything is real, this Christianity is real, God is real, but I can’t be sure. But if God isn’t real, then my life is not worth living and I might as well end it.” One year when I went to camp I had hit such a low point that I was literally not sure I would make it through the week alive, if I could get up the guts to end it all. It is only by God’s grace that I am here today. This is the Christian kid who had been taught all the evidence, yet I couldn’t believe. The evidence added up for the existence of God, but I couldn’t be certain. Finally, I said to God, “God, I can’t feel You, I can’t see You, I can’t be certain about You, but everything points to You and I can’t live without You.” This is my personal experience. Some would say that this just shows a weakness in me requiring a psychological crutch. I would say, how can you find meaning in this life if this world, this life, is all there is? If that’s true, life is a cruel joke.

Science is science, not philosophy. Science cannot conclude that there is or is not a God. Every scientist made a philosophical decision when he chose to believe or not to believe in God. Many scientists who reject God did so before they were ever scientists. Certainly some of them don’t want to believe it. Romans 1 says, “that which is known about God is evident within them; for God made it evident to them. For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes, His eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly seen, being understood through what has been made, so that they are without excuse. For even though they knew God, they did not honor Him as God or give thanks, but they became futile in their speculations, and their foolish heart was darkened.” For a lot of people, it is easy to deny God, to desire to deny God, because if God is real, that means there is something bigger than us that we are accountable to. Other scientists just have not investigated it and are content to live without raising the question. If you look up scientists and other atheists who genuinely investigated the evidence, you will find that many of them became believers through it (if you want more specifics on this just ask). There are always going to be people that protest the evidence.

Know that when all is said and done, no one can force you to believe. I can’t, your parents can’t, your friends can’t. In the end, that is between you and God alone. You’ve been reading up on the evidence–it points to God, but you have to trust Him.

Your feelings are going to change. One day you’re fine, the next you’re paralyzed with doubt. Falling is part of learning to walk. You can look at all the failures and give up, or you can look at the baby steps and keep pressing on. I made that decision to believe in God, coming back to Him after two years, but that doesn’t mean I never doubted again. There were a LOT of ups and downs. Faith can’t be based on your feelings, because feelings aren’t a constant.

I’ve read your article and most of your other comments on here and one line of that stuck out to me: “I am scared that I will push away the urges of the Holy Spirit because they make me uncomfortable and it is simply TOO SCARY for me to be uncomfortable.” Can’t recall who said this, but, Don’t doubt in the dark what God has shown you in the light. You have seen God work and you have felt His promptings. Look at how you’ve seen Him work before when you can’t see Him in the here and now. When you’re struggling, often your perspective is flawed or tunnel vision. You said, “nothing seems to be getting better.” We can’t always see at the moment what God is doing–only when we look back on it years down the road.

This has been a super long comment and I am sorry for the long-windedness. One last thing. You said, “I started trying to make it my own and it went well for a few months, but then BAM doubt crept in. I cant even remember the exact day, but it just showed up and won’t go away.” How did it go well? I know you can’t remember exactly when things changed and you started doubting, but what was different from before when you did?

Your sister in Christ, Anna Grace

Don’t be sorry; I didn’t think it was that long! 😉 And yeah, God does have a sense of humor sometimes, in the “coincidences”. Re: taking the time to talk to you–you’re welcome. I certainly don’t have it all together either (my family would tell you that in a heartbeat!)–and no matter how well they fake it, no one has it all together. As for me ‘having no reason to talk to you’…well…God gave us brothers and sisters in Christ for a reason. Paul in his epistles uses this Greek word ‘parakaleo’ which means ‘coming alongside to help’. And that’s what we as Christians are supposed to do for each other. Plus, we care about you. Oh and technically…I have seen your face–your bio on the article had a photo 😉

How we can doubt when there is no way things happened by random chance…personally, I’ve never been able to sort that one out, especially for people like us that actually do want to believe.

One thing you have to realize about science: everyone has the same pieces, but not everyone tries to put them together the same way. Creationist, evolutionist, naturalist, Christian–no matter what the scientist believes, he’s looking at the same fossils or biology or etc. as any other scientist. The difference comes in the interpretation of those pieces, the conclusions drawn based on those pieces. Everyone’s putting the pieces through their own grid–the atheistic scientist looks at the pieces and thinks, because there is no creator, no designer, this is what must have happened; the Christian scientist looks at the pieces and thinks, because there is a creator, a designer, this must be. No scientist is completely objective, without a bias. To use one example that I think is in The Case for a Creator, consider Archaeopteryx. Honestly, I am not sure it can be proven whether it is a bird or a dinosaur, but I think the evidence points toward it being a bird. A scientist who believes–yes, believes –in evolution will look at Archaeopteryx and say, It has to be a transition between a bird and a dinosaur. Neither of us can prove beyond a shadow of a doubt what Archaeopteryx is–at some point, our philosophical (not scientific) presuppositions come into play. You see what I’m saying? Every scientist has a filter he is putting the evidence through. If one is not determined to believe that there is no creator, it is very logical to believe that there is one.

This article (http://godevidence.com/2010/10/if-the-evidence-for-god-is-so-strong-why-are-so-many-smart-people-unconvinced/) has some good points so if you have time I’d suggest reading it. However, I did NOT click on any of the links within the article so I don’t know anything about those.

Last thing for this time, I promise!–how were things different once you had started to doubt?

Your sister in Christ, Anna Grace

Wow yeah one thing God has really hit me with lately is the realization that–the church is my brothers and sisters! We are a family! And we have to stand together or we fall apart. We have to have each other’s backs. And “love covers a multitude of sins.” I’ve always know that verse in theory, but now it’s like I know it by experience–our differences kind of fade into the background when we consider that we have Christ in common and that is enough. Even on this site–we definitely don’t all agree on certain points of theology 😉 but that doesn’t drive a wedge between us. And, agreed–if I could have seen you at all during this, I would have given you a hug a dozen times over. 🙂

You are so right about the faith+evidence+God-at-work stuff. Faith untested is what we all start out with–the place that we all have to start–but faith grows so much deeper when it has been tried and found to be placed on solid rock. I am praying for you & so are the others–cannot express to you what a burden God has placed on my heart for you & your last comment was sooo encouraging.

Honestly, we’re all kind of at our best when we are at church–putting our best foot forward. Not everyone’s as tight with God as they appear to be. Not even me. If I could wish one thing it would be that I wish people would be more vulnerable and make other people feel as if it is safe to be vulnerable. And maybe that’s something that even you could start a chain reaction for, in your youth group or Sunday school or just with other people at church. One summer when I worked at a camp, I was assigned to work with a group of girls that I did not really know and during the training week we were supposed to have “bonding time” and share our testimonies. There’s two versions of my testimony–the “cleaned-up”, glossed-over version that is good if you are sharing with little kids (making it age-appropriate) and the absolute, scary truth that lays bare my soul. And I could sense that God wanted me to share the second version with these girls. I argued with Him. Because it is terrifying to let someone see you that vulnerable. (Out of everything I’ve typed to you, the hardest thing was sharing my story.) But I did–and you know what? It drew the seven of us so close together and we were able to be so real with one another and became one of the closest-knit teams working at the camp that summer. It was such a blessing and absolutely amazing. And maybe it’s you that will start that chain reaction in your circle.

With the tears and frustration…I’ve been there, oh have I been there. In those lowest times it is hard to do but you have to cry out to God and focus on who He is and try to catch His perspective. Or if you can’t, get someone else to say it to you. Not that it’s easy–there have been a lot of times, actually probably most of the time because I still have a ton of growth to do in this area, where I didn’t seek God in my low points. But when you do, it does help so much.

Definitely will keep on praying for you. You will get through this–this is a season in your life just like the “good” times are. Never give up. Your sister in Christ, Anna Grace

Yes! That is so tough–you “meet” people but you can’t really connect in real life.
Recently I read this book called Not by Chance and through the book the author tells of several incidents where he had unbelievers ask him, “Why? Why would God allow that to happen?” and trying to gently explain. Then, years later, he saw that God was preparing him thru those encounters for when he and his wife lost their son and they were asking, “Why?” You never know what God is gonna do through it, but it’s all for a reason. Maybe someday you will be the one talking with someone who is in the situation you’re in now.
That is so cool that you had that opportunity with your youth group. 🙂 His timing is perfect. Yesterday (Sunday) the speaker at my church (we have been without a pastor for about a year) was talking about Moses and how when God called him to go speak to Pharaoh, Moses basically said, “Send someone else, God! You can’t use me! I can’t do this! I have a speech impediment!” And he said that isn’t it crazy that we actually believe God can’t use us for this or that? He’s God! We put limits on what we think He can do, when He is able. With this conversation, sometimes, I really didn’t know what to say, and it was all God. I was like, “God, I’m in over my head here! HELP!” I felt so inadequate. And so that sermon hit me like a brick–who am I to say what God can do with me?
When you can only see the scattered pieces, trust the One Who holds the puzzle box.
You’re welcome and thank you so much for your prayers as well. Home life has been a little rough lately, and it’s so encouraging to know that someone’s talking to God for me. Praying for you that He will reveal Himself to you more and more.
Your sister in Christ, Anna Grace (that’s so neat about the name :))

So glad to have “met” you too 🙂 and yeah I think we all want to know we’re not alone.
My problem a lot of times is knowing the Bible is truth but often not seeing its relevance in the situations of my life–translating its truth to application. Like, “I know that’s true, but how does it actually work out in real life?” God’s still working on me on that one.
Re: seeing the Bible as truth instead of just a collection of stories…referring back to our earlier discussion, we both said that if there is no God, there is absolutely no meaning to life, no reason to keep on living. Well, God’s existence not only gives us a meaning for life, but He gave us a guidebook for life. He is the source of truth. I think believing in the “craziness” of miracles goes right along with believing in God–I mean, if He’s really God, why would any of that be impossible for Him? Or even hard for Him? If God can’t be trusted to tell the truth about those parts, how can we trust Him to tell the truth about the gospel? And as Paul says, “If in this life only we have hope in Christ, we are of all men most miserable.” (1Cor15:19). The resurrection is the biggest miracle in the Bible–if God cannot bring the dead to life, what does the rest of it matter? If this life is all there is, where is hope?
Actually, my church has close to zero young adults–I only have one good friend who lives nearby right now. So I communicate with most of my friends thru a screen (except my best friend who isn’t into screens so we write letters). But there are a few older ladies in my church that I talk to about different stuff and they are super encouraging.
If you could mostly pray for me that I would be Christ to my family, that I would imitate HIM and not allow my circumstances to define me. Sometimes my parents yell at each other or at us (my siblings and I) and that is really difficult. During those times I just want out/to hide until it’s over but in a small house that’s not really possible. It’s not like that all the time but we just don’t have any unity as a family. It’s tough not to be jealous of my one good friend who lives close and has a family that is really close to one another and doesn’t fight. Pray that I’ll remember and believe that “I am here–1) by God’s appointment 2) in His keeping 3) under His training 4) for His time.” Thank you so much. Your sister in Christ, AnnaGrace

I don’t think a lot of people’s doubt comes down to logic. Like you said, it’s really illogical, yet we doubt anyway. Honestly, I never really figured out the “why” behind my not believing–I wanted to, I had every reason to believe.

Nearly every Christian, whether they admit it or not, has struggled with doubt at some time. I think doubt is part of faith, not the opposite of it. Unbelief–a willful refusal to believe–is the opposite of faith. Doubt is an inner uncertainty; doubt is not unbelief.

‘”Tell me,” she said, “do you think a real Christian can feel as I do? For my part I doubt it. I doubt everything.”
“Doubt everything, but believe in Christ,” I said. “Suppose, for argument’s sake, you are not a Christian. You can become one now.” The color rose in her lovely face; she clasped her hands in a sort of ecstasy.
“Yes,” she said, “I can.”‘ ~Stepping Heavenward

From what I’ve seen of you, I would say I believe you truly are saved. But ultimately, that is between you and the Lord. But just remember, if you are not a Christian, you can become one now. John wrote in his first epistle, “If our heart condemn us, God is greater than our heart, and knows all things.” (3:20) God knows your heart. He knows your struggle. Your emotions are going to go up and down–actually, I was kind of waiting for this to happen, because it happened to me. But God doesn’t change! You are so right that it is by His power and not our own that we can walk. We walk by the Spirit.

Perhaps it does come down to surrender. I used to think surrender was about a commitment you made at camp or something and then all the pieces fell into place after that. It’s not. Surrender is a daily, hourly, minute-by-minute decision. And no matter how committed we are, we are going to fail. If you never fall, guess what? You must be in heaven! Because not until then do our struggles truly end. I’m praying for you. There is hope! This part of your spiritual road is bumpy, but the whole road isn’t like that–I promise, as someone who’s been there. And just because I’ve gotten past the crisis doesn’t mean I never struggle with doubt. It does come back sometimes and it’s hard. Keep putting your focus back on God–every moment as those thoughts come. I know that is so much easier than done but that is what you have to learn to do.

So glad to hear that you can talk to your mom about this stuff 🙂 She’s older and probably way wiser than either of us.

I found this article ( http://www.keepbelieving.com/sermon/if-i-believe-why-do-i-doubt/ ) the other day and it says what I’m trying to say a whole lot better than I can.

Thank you for your prayers. Your sister in Christ, Anna (this double name thing is getting annoying, to me anyway; it sounds too stiff; call me whatever you wish)

Sorry I’ve taken longer to respond than usual…I have to say, I honestly don’t know what to tell you. I don’t have all the answers. But I’ve been praying to God for wisdom and for the words to say, so I’ll try.

Don’t judge your faith by your emotions. Because they change constantly. Struggling with God does not mean you lack faith; faith cannot grow without struggle. Paul said to work out your salvation with fear and trembling. Belief may be easy for some, but for others of us it is hard work. Being 100% on fire and sold out is the goal, but it is not always the daily reality. And as much as we admire the people who seem to always be passionate about God, we don’t see their struggles, their hearts, who they are when they are alone.

It truly is all about God. Hebrews 11 is often called the “Hall of Faith” and one of the names listed in it is that of Barak. In the book of Judges, Israel repeatedly fell into sin, experienced God’s judgment, and cried out to Him for deliverance. One time, God looked down and saw that there was not a single man in Israel who would do it. So He sent a woman to light a fire under a man to do it–Deborah. She went to Barak and told him that God wanted him to muster an army, fight Sisera’s formidable forces, and deliver Israel. Barak wouldn’t believe her. Finally he agreed, but only if Deborah would come with him. And God did deliver Israel. If anyone struggled with believing, it was Barak. Yet because he did obey God, in spite of his doubts, he is listed as a man of great faith. Because even though he had his doubts, he acted on his faith. I can’t see the future and what He will do through your story. But your struggle does not mean He doesn’t want to use you, that He can’t use you.

Like I said earlier, I can’t make you believe. But I am confident that the word of God is truth, that God is there and He hears and He loves you in spite of your doubts and everything else. “Borrow” my faith. “Borrow” your mom’s faith, your best friend’s faith. If that makes sense.
Let me ask you a question. Do you believe Christ loved His disciples when they argued about who was the greatest right before He was to die, and deserted Him in His hour of greatest need? Do you believe He loved the soldiers who nailed Him to that cross, the Jews who exchanged His life for that of a criminal? And that is the God who loves you.

When John the Baptist was thrown in prison by Herod, after a time he sent messengers to Jesus to ask, “Are you Messiah, or should we look for someone else?” This is John the Baptist! The one who said of Jesus, “I have seen and testify that this is the Son of God”! But Jesus does not rebuke John. He tells the messengers, basically, “Go and tell John that in My name the hurting people of this world are being transformed.” And even as the messengers are leaving, Jesus turns to the crowd and tells them that John is a prophet, yes, more than a prophet–the messenger sent to prepare the way before Him. Now, where was John? Still in prison. Still wrestling with doubt and uncertainty. Still unsure about Jesus. Yet Jesus affirms His faith in John–while John is still doubting. Jesus knew that beneath those doubts was genuine faith. “John is still My man, doubts and all.” (adapted from http://www.keepbelieving.com/sermon/if-i-believe-why-do-i-doubt/ )

You’re welcome and all I can say is, prayer doesn’t mean anything if not for the One we are praying to. He’s the one who makes the difference. We’re just the ones asking the One who can do something about it. 🙂
One of my friends that I asked to pray for you specifically asked me about you the other day and she wanted you to know that you are in her thoughts and prayers too.
Your sister in Christ, Anna (if you set ‘Julia Grace’ as your disqus name you can have the satisfaction of seeing it without having to type it every time 😉 like I did with mine)
P.S. That quote from Stepping Heavenward has meant a lot to me and I’m so glad it could encourage you. 🙂

It makes a lot of sense. 🙂 I think most Christian kids have experienced that feeling at one time or another–that their faith is more inherited and personal. There’s nothing wrong with feeling that way. It’s what you do about it that matters. A solid foundation doesn’t just happen–it’s something you build into your life. Glad you have found Lee Strobel’s books and if you care to check it out, Answers in Genesis has a TON of stuff too…( https://answersingenesis.org/god/ https://answersingenesis.org/worldview/ https://answersingenesis.org/bible/ ).
Emotions and reason are two sides of the same coin and both of them are important. I read somewhere recently that worship “has its mystical side in subjective experience and its practical side in objective obedience to God’s revealed will.” It’s great when we feel it–but we aren’t going to always feel it, and that’s where the foundation to stand on comes in. It gives you a rock to stand on when your emotions are all over the place.
“…really, really trying to believe that He has a bigger purpose for this even though I can’t see it now, but when you’re stuck in the middle of it, that’s hard to see.” Agreed. It’s so hard to see the big picture when you are struggling just to make it through today. “From the end of the earth will I cry to You, when my heart is overwhelmed; lead me to the Rock that is higher than I.” (Psalm 61:2) Recently a besetting sin of mine in my thought life hit me really hard again and I found myself constantly confessing to the Lord and asking Him, Lord guard my mind! I can’t do this on my own! Those are the times when crying out to God becomes an hourly, minute-by-minute thing.

This is truly a spiritual battle. You know what? Satan doesn’t go after the people who are lukewarm and anemic. He doesn’t go after the people who are headed straight away from God. Because he’s already got them. Satan goes after the people who are seeking God and the people who he knows God wants to do big things with. I’m praying for you. I’ve faced that same sense of darkness–like standing on the edge of a cliff and looking out on an endless void without God. My friend said it this way: “It’s not trying to see the light through overwhelming darkness. It’s removing the blinder Satan has placed over your eyes to try and keep you from seeing the all encompassing light around you.
God is there. He is bigger. The scars on my wrist say so.” The darkness is not the reality. God is the ultimate reality, and He is Light itself.
About Jacob…amen!

My friend says you’re welcome! 🙂 And same here–I am finding that I have to be totally dependent on God and counsel from others thru this. And you’re right–it is so humbling. Honestly, this is all God–anything I say to you. It’s not me. I have nothing to say that does not come from Him and Him alone. To God be the glory!
Your sister in Christ, Anna

Hey Julia,

If it helps, I’ve also been dealing with depression lately. So have some of my very good friends. It turns out, many great leaders and famous people suffer from depression. That tells a little about who Satan is targeting.

But it doesn’t last forever! And the trials don’t go back to back! For me, it lasted for about a month. It modivated me to do something about the physical causes – like busyness and procrastination. Now it’s gone. And while I am expecting more challenges in the future, God’s given me a break in between. Maybe that will help for you – knowing that tough times and trials don’t run continually for too long. Thanks!

Trent

Well, it did require redical change in my life, but practically and spiritually.

It started right before I got my new job. And it got worse when I started it. I was stressed almost all the time, except for a few minutes right after I was done with the work day, and than I would soon become worried about having to write next article on my website. And than in school, my grades started dropping. It got to the point where I was always stressed about responsibilities. That gave birth to guilt when I took a break, which gave birth to depression, whuch gave birth to dread of every day, even Sunday becuase I knew I would be thinking about Monday the whole day.

It lasted a while. Two-Three weeks seemed like 2-3 years. I felt like it would last forever. I knew something had to change.

So i began to slowly let people in on my true feelings, than my mom (that was tough). I also cut back many responsibilities, including my website, one social media site, and the excess time I spend here.

That helped some. But it still came in flashes. It was just about half as often.

Than I went on a youth event about a week ago and verbally surrendered my life, choices, and responsibilities to Him. I do that every so often now.

Now, I feel peace as I do work and as I rest. I don’t have anxiety as often any more. I have it about as often as I had happiness in the depression – in other words, it’s almost nonexistent.

So if you keep things the same, things may stay thr same indefinitely. But if you are active in changing things, than thay sure does help. 🙂

when

I can’t tell you why. I don’t know why He doesn’t just lift us out of these things. Job asked God why and God didn’t tell him either, just reminded Job of Who He is. All I can do is point you back to HIM.

You’re not the only one who hasn’t been able to see the light at the end of then tunnel. Psalm 88 ends with the writer still despairing. He didn’t receive an answer right away. But he went to God, and he was honest about his struggle. He cried out to a God who seemed angry and distant: “Where are You? I know you’re there and I know there’s light, but I can’t see it!” Why can everyone around me see the light but I can’t? http://www.desiringgod.org/articles/the-bleakest-psalm-is-really-a-night-light I know it’s hard to trust Him. I know it’s hard to keep going. And “If you ever come to the place where you can’t run, then walk. If you can’t walk, then crawl. If you can’t even crawl and you are on the ‘ground,’ and all you can do is look at Christ, then look with all your heart, soul, and mind! That is OKAY to be there. Just never take your eyes away from Christ!” ~ http://therebelution.com/blog/2013/08/im-angry-at-god/

“And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.” 1 Peter 5:10. He will. That’s a promise.

“We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; 9 persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.” 2 Cor 4:8-9 God has not abandoned you. Nothing–not even your doubts–can separate you from the love of God. Rom 8:38-39
He is the God of hope. (Rom 15:13) He is the God of peace. (Rom 16:20) He is the God of all comfort. (2 Cor 1:3)

“…it’s so hard to keep fighting…” God has already won. We know the end of the story. The enemy of your soul LOSES. That is reality. That is TRUTH. That is what the God who is truth itself has told us.

Your sister in Christ,
Anna

Julia…you have no idea how much of an answer to prayer this is! Praise God. One of the hardest things about this conversation for me has been not being able to be there in “real life”–but it’s so good to hear you can talk to your mom and that your youth pastor spoke on this. He puts all the pieces together, even when we can’t see them.

Falling is part of learning to walk–but we have this promise, “The eternal God is our refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms.” (Deut. 33:27)

I’ll be praying that for you too–that God will replace the darkness, the lies from Satan, with the light of His truth. ya know, something that can be super helpful is to make a list with two columns when you are struggling with thoughts that are not the truth. Label them “What I Feel” and “What is Real”. Put your thoughts–what is from the enemy–under “what I feel”, and the promises of God and the truth under “what is real”.

You’re so welcome! God is faithful!
Your sister in Christ,
Anna

I’ve been on that same roller coaster for most of my life…
Max Lucado’s writing is so good! I’d say he’s one of my favorite authors, but…anyone whose book I read more than a few pages of is usually on my “favorite authors” list. 🙂 And when you have so many favorites it doesn’t mean a whole lot to call someone your favorite. I hope that makes sense. 🙂
I hope the prayer journaling will help you. 🙂 Prayer is honestly one of the hardest spiritual disciplines for me…I get distracted easily and I’m not good at expressing myself verbally-writing is a LOT easier. So writing my prayers has been so helpful. And the dates give me some accountability. But when I say I’ll pray for someone, that’s a promise, no matter how hard it is to keep it.
You’re welcome. It stinks not being able to be there physically. So thankful for your mom and your youth pastor who can be. And if I can ask one thing…pour out that thankfulness by pouring into other people. Everyone has scars. Everyone, no matter how hard they seem, has that soft spot that hurts, even if they’ve buried it well. Pass on the gift. Be there for them. On one of the very worst nights when I was struggling and looking off that cliff into the darkness, my friend S. came alongside me and was just…there for me, and even though she doesn’t remember it now, that night made a huge impact in my life. I can’t ever repay her. Except by doing this.
Your sister in Christ,
Anna

“One thing I can’t figure out is why I don’t want God more. I should want Him!…why I don’t love God as much as I should.” Agreed. Completely. I’ve been there–still am from time to time–and it’s a place of immeasurable guilt. You want to love God, but you cannot love God as you should. You know you should but you cannot. Don’t get stuck there. Don’t pursue loving God or finding joy in God–pursue God and the love for Him and joy in Him will come. Then you will love what He loves and hate what He hates. Stop asking the question, “Do I love God?” and look at “He who has my commandments and keeps them is he who loves me.” (Jn14:21a) That is surrender. Do not look at the past when you think that but look at today, how I can obey Him today. Do you know what the Lord Jesus says to the one who keeps His commandments? “I…will reveal myself to him [or her, in this case].” (Jn14:21c) Choose God over the darkness. “You can will…to obey the will of God when no comfortable glow of emotion accompanies your obedience.” (Stepping Heavenward, p.89) I know it’s hard. That’s why it’s one step at a time. What is the next thing, in this moment, that the Lord would have you do? Maybe it’s making your mom’s life easier by doing the dishes instead of what you wanted to do with that time. Maybe it’s being faithful and getting your homework (schoolwork if you’re homeschooled) done. Maybe it’s reaching out to that girl at youth group that nobody talks to. Your mom may not be a huge fan of doing laundry, and maybe she’s not the best at cooking, but she does it anyway, every day. Why? Because she loves you. If she didn’t love you, after a while she would give up. She would have no motivation to do it. She might not always feel like she loves her children–when the baby’s screaming, it’s been a frustrating day, and her teenager is talking back to her–but she does love them. How do you know that? Because she works for their benefit anyway.

Why is the darkness enticing, for you?

Praying for praying…haha 🙂 that one made me crack up. A lot of my prayers go something like this: “Dear God, I pray that if it be Your will you would heal my friend E…I wonder what’s for dinner. We haven’t had macaroni and cheese in a while…oh no, I did it again! God, forgive me for my lack of focus. Please keep my thoughts fixed on You…” *repeat indefinitely* It’s embarrassing how often I get sidetracked. Sometimes I lock myself in the bathroom or sit in the back room of our basement so nothing around me can distract me! Keeping a list and persisting till you get through it helps too. Corrie ten Boom said, “Make an appointment with God, and keep it! Pray when you feel like it, pray when you don’t feel like it, and pray until you feel like it.” The struggle is real. But don’t give up. Spiritual progress is not made when you are thinking about it or obsessing about it and bemoaning how far you have to go. It’s made when you devote yourself to pursuing God.

Your sister in Christ, Anna

Sorry it’s taken me so long to get back to you! 🙁 Usually I’m better about this…
Those are some hard realizations. Echoes my thoughts about my own life most of the time. If I truly believed everything I know about God (by believe, I mean live accordingly), I’d be a lot different.
About the darkness thing…have to be honest, I don’t really get it. And I don’t know what to say…except, what you dwell on, think about, is a big deal. Thoughts become words, words become actions. If you dwell on it, you’ll start to believe it, and view things differently because of it. Think on whatever is true, honorable, right, pure, lovely, of good repute, excellent, and praiseworthy. God is Light, and in Him is no darkness at all. Darkness is not of God.
Your sister in Christ,
Anna
p.s. Happy late Thanksgiving! and I’m really sorry I can’t be more helpful on this. 🙁

You’re totally fine! And I can’t thank you enough for being there for me through this- it’s been one of the toughest things I’ve gone through and even though we might never meet face to face…having you to talk to helped more than you’ll probably ever know. You’re a Godsend. Anyway, yeah I’m still struggling through that, but I think God is breaking me down some. And maybe its more about me resisting Him than anything else-because I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this yet but I’m a bit of a control freak.
So that’s been my issue as of late- trying to find out who God really is and what that means for me. Letting go of control is tough- and I still haven’t quite figured out how to. One thing this is doing, it’s bringing me more to terms with who I am and my perceptions of God. I think they’ve been more than a little off for awhile. I’m still trying to want Him more- and really know who He is and that He really is real. So if you could pray for me on that 🙂 I’ll keep you in my prayers!
Your Sister in Christ,
Julia

Praying for you tonight, Julia 🙂 How are you doing?

Absolutely, I will continue to pray for you. Thank you for praying for me, I really appreciate it, and need it. I have been a little scattered and stretched spiritually, lately. But, God is good! He is so very good.

Your Sister in Christ,
Haylie

Thank you, Julia. 🙂 I’m here for you too <3

Sorry for the late response! Life is crazy with finals and upcoming Christmas! But yeah, I’m still riding my insane emotional roller coaster, which really stinks because the lows aren’t fun and the highs are good-but still the lows keep coming. Anyhow, thanks for your comments- insight on scripture is SO appreciated as i don’t understand it much. I don’t know how to trust God enough to let Him in to fight my battles for me- and that’s hard for sure because I can’t fight them myself. So yeah, that’s a struggle lately…but I guess if life was perfect we wouldn’t have to look forward to heaven too much. Still trying to make sense of all that & heaven and God & all those questions.

Huh. With the passage with Peter- I never thought of it that way. That Jesus was telling bette- HERE IS HOW YOURE GOING TO LOVE ME. You don’t now, but you will love me that way later. I’m still having trouble truly seeking God, but he’s kind of bringing me to the point where I HAVE to even if I don’t know how he’s real or even if he is for certain. The darkness still is so tough…

I was reading John earlier and stumbled across this verse- “They are not of the world, even as I am not of it. Sanctify them By the truth; your word is truth.” And there was a note about the original word Jesus used- I don’t have my Bible in front of me right now so I can’t remember exactly, but it meant to set apart, to make holy. So that’s my prayer now, to be sanctified by the truth. If you wouldn’t mind praying for me in that aspect 😉

Thanks again!

Much love- your sister in Christ,

Julia

Yes! It’s so hard to believe that it’s Christmas– we’re planning like crazy over here. Anyway, hope your Christmas season is going well.

John is probably my favorite book lately- and I don’t yet have a reading plan, but I have a read through the Bible in a year one for 2016 that I’m excited about 🙂 I’m still having some issues doubting-wise but I found some good apologetics books. It’s tough, but I’m trying to trust that God is up there and it’s going to take awhile, but it’s going to be worth it!

“God only asks you to live one day at a time. The darkness has an end! Ask God to give you faith when you feel like you can’t believe-faith for today.” Ah, I really like this! And the Bible study methods–thank you so much, will definitely be using them!

Hope you are doing well- is there anything you need prayer for? Merry Christmas!!

Your sister in Christ,

Julia

So sorry that I’m getting back to you incredibly late on this. I’ve been super busy lately getting back into the swing of things. Glad to hear your Christmas went well- ours did as well, we got to see a bunch of family, so that’s always nice. Yes…short term goals might be simpler because following a year plan is harder than I anticipated–I’m caught up at the moment though!!

I’ve been trying to read more and more apologetics lately–but I still have doubts. If you don’t mind me asking, when you were doubting how did you really start believing in God again? Was it sudden or gradual?

Definitely keeping you in my prayers–that’s a difficult thing, especially when there are people around you that it is much easier to listen to!

See, to be honest…that’s EXACTLY where I am now. Basically, I would say I’m more of an agnostic at this point. I don’t NOT believe in God, but I don’t necessarily believe in him either. I don’t really know how you can prove either. But really, there is no point to life if there’s not a God. We’re all living our lives trying to be good people, but none of it matters if atheism is true. I don’t know where to go from here though, I don’t feel like I can say I believe in God and commit to him if I don’t know if he’s there or not.
I Have been trying to get answers, unfortunately I seem to have this desire to seek out people that will disagree. I guess I just feel like Christianity isn’t true and I just need to search for those that disagree with whats presented in the books…and then I get more and more confused. Atheists like to argue about Christianity, it seems…and make you feel foolish for even considering believing it. I want to be open minded, but I am honestly so terrified that atheism might be true no matter how badly I want to believe in Christianity. There are so many prominent atheists, it seems. And no matter what is presented there’s always a counterargument.
I don’t think I have any allergies, although I may want to look at the physical side of this as well as the emotional side. Honestly, all I want in the end of the day is truth. And I very badly want Christianity to be the truth, but I don’t know how to know in the sea of people shouting that their views are the truth.

Hey Julia,
This is Faith, I have been praying for you and I do believe I know some songs that could cheer you up. Flawless by Mercyme and overcome by Mandisa these have encouraged me and I hope they encourage you. I would say also to get into the word of God and find verses to believe and to stand on those those dark days of depression. Here are a few 2 Corinthians 5:7, Isaiah 40:29,John 16:22-24.

If you want evidence for intelligent design–for a creator–I can give you that. But what are you really looking for? You said, “Atheists like to argue about Christianity, it seems…and make you feel foolish for even considering believing it…. There are so many prominent atheists, it seems. And no matter what is presented there’s always a counterargument.” Regardless of what the truth actually is, a mind that does not want to believe it will find a way to believe the lie it is looking for. Many atheists do not want to believe in God. I have a friend who decided that she didn’t believe in God so that she could live how she wanted to, without accountability. That’s not the reason she gives but it is true that she wanted to live promiscuously etc, then felt tremendous guilt about it, then ‘fixed the problem’ by becoming an atheist.

Atheism is not scientific. Science cannot prove the existence of God or not. We both have same evidence–how we choose to interpret it is not science. It is filtered through our worldview. However, I think there is a lot to support the conclusion that there is a God. You said, “I don’t feel like I can say I believe in God and commit to him if I don’t know if he’s there or not.” Understand this one thing: belief in God takes faith. And belief that God does not exist takes faith. Either way you are committing to something. You cannot prove either. But if you came across writing in the sand on a beach, wouldn’t you logically conclude that someone intelligent had to have done it? Or would you say that the waves did it? If an Iphone washed up on the beach, would you say that the sea made it?

“But really, there is no point to life if there’s not a God. We’re all
living our lives trying to be good people, but none of it matters if
atheism is true.” It doesn’t matter if Christianity is true, either. Because the word of God says that none of us are good, no matter how hard we try. You may be able to throw a rock farther than I can, but neither of us could hit the North Pole, from where we are standing. We can compare ourselves to other people all we want but when God is the standard we are all miserable failures. “Not by works of righteousness that we have done, but by His mercy He saved us”!

If you accept atheism, you decide that you determine truth. If you accept Christianity, you decide that God determines truth. If you accept another religion, you decide that its founder determines truth. If you accept atheism, you have decided you are God. If you accept another religion, you decide to follow a leader whose claims cannot be proven because they all died and they cannot tell you whether their claims about the afterlife are true. Christianity is the only one where we do have a leader (Jesus Christ) who came back from the dead. Disprove the resurrection and you disprove Christianity. Jesus is the only one who can tell us what happens after death, because He is the only one that has come back from death.

Can I ask you a question: Why do you think that Christianity isn’t true? And how do you test an idea to verify its truth? ~Anna

Sorry, I’ll reply fully to this later. But I was wondering if you could pray for me, basically with all the darkness and fear and stuff…it’s tough :-/
Thanks! Your sister in Christ,

Julia

Hey there, miss Julia. I’m still praying for you. 🙂 Are you doing okay?

Sure I’ll pray for you! and already have been 🙂 & take your time–I don’t mind. Whenever you’re ready. Your sister in Christ, Anna

Hey Haylie! I’m alright, still struggling with a lot of doubt and fear, but I’m doing okay I suppose 🙂 thanks for the prayers, I really appreciate them!!

Your sister in Christ,
Julia

You’re welcome! The darkness can ensnare you, but if you know somebody who has faced this before and conquered – by all means, find out how they did it! It can really help. A few tips I’ve learned over the past few months:
1. Don’t associate yourself with dark pictures, movies, sayings, or people – it greatly encourages the darkness that you yourself face.
2. Acknowledge the light ahead – though it may be dim, and sometimes may seem like an illusion, know that God’s Light is ahead, leading you to peace and joy.
3. Recognize the obstacles between you and the Light, and also recognize what tools to use to get around/over them – or even through them if need be.
4. Pray.
5. Pray.
6. Seek guidance from parents or older people you trust. Their wisdom is priceless and so helpful!
7. Never give up – remember it is God who wants you, and God who will get what He wants – all plans work together for Good.
8. (This step is incredibly simple, and sometimes irritatingly so – yet it helps me sometimes, even though I don’t struggle with depression): figure out why you’re sad, and what made that turn into depression. Often it is something small and irritating – sometimes it can be very big, I’m not trying to mock your problem(s). Remember our friends the oysters: they get a grain of sand in their mouth, and it irritates and probably hurts. They rub it, trying to get rid of it – and over time, it turns into a beautiful, valuable pearl.
Turn your problems into pearls. Find out what good you can bring out of them. If somebody hurt you, wronged you, or anything else – get right with that person.
Yes, you need to resolve to keep fighting even when it gets hard, but you have to know *why* you’re fighting. You are fighting to conquer this problem that is getting you down, wearing you out – so that why? What are you going to do with it? Conquer it, and use it to serve the LORD and draw you closer to Him.
I’ll be praying for you.

”
Well I don’t want to be insensitive to your issues; I understand that they can get people down easily. But the important thing is that we don’t stay down. TobyMac, a Christian harder-rock styled artist I used to listen to, wrote a song called “Get Back Up”, and part of the chorus is:

“We lose our way,
We get back up again
Never too late to get back up again,
One day, you gonna shine again,
You may be knocked down but not out forever.”

If we have that attitude, that mentality, that mindset, then literally nothing can keep us down – because we know that God will lift us from the dark pit that we’ve fallen into.

Sometimes you can’t get out of that pit by yourself, which is why God is there. But there is incredible truth in his (TobyMac’s) words, “never too late to get back up again”. There is no time that is too early or late to get up; God will never leave you nor forsake you, and He will definitely always be welcoming you back to Joy.

When I’m sad, I typically think of why I’m sad, and (if it’s a legitimate reason), typically exaggerate my sorrows or pain, much like you said. So we are similar there. But let me tell you, the thing that has helped me most is talking to my mom about what is hurting me.

Your detox sounds neat! I’ve used several detoxes for minor things for myself, usually the detox being eating, but they’ve worked so far. 🙂 I hope yours works out.

You said you don’t know how to turn problems into pearls…

First off, some of the comments on the DQ “How can I glorify God through my injury?” might help (http://therebelution.com/blog/2016/02/how-can-i-glorify-god-through-my-injury/). Secondly, think of why you’re struggling with your problems, and then figure out how you can bring good out of them.

Look at Romans 8:28a, which says: “We know that all things work together for good for those who love God”.
1. All things work together for Good – pray! and ask God why He gave you this depression. Was it to draw you closer to Him in your quest to reach the Light again? Think about it. Think about why God might want you to suffer. Is He training or preparing you for something?
2. For those who love God – This is another reason to pray! Pray that His Divine plan might be carried out through you, and that He will show you what you need to do.
But let me remind you that sometimes God’s answers can be no. Start Here says somewhere (I can never find quotes when I need them! Like a Corrie Ten Boom quote would have gone well in this message) that God’s answers are sometimes yes, sometimes no, sometimes not now, and sometimes not in this way. So you have to be able to discern the difference and accept the answer.
What kind of music helps you feel better?

Yea, no problem. You are amazing and Jesus sees you as that not as what you think you are. He wants you to overcome!:)

To be honest, it’s a little bit of both. I guess I just don’t really know how to know what the truth is? And how to know that the Bible is truth and trust it?

I’ll try that–listening to Christian music and focusing on the lyrics 🙂

Thanks!
Your sister in Christ,
Julia

Yea, your welcome. I have been good. I never really had depression; have you?

I’m not sure what kind of proof you’re looking for, but I do know that there is lots of it out there. http://www.accordingtothescriptures.org/prophecy/353prophecies.html has a list of 355 (despite it saying 353 :P) prophecies that are named, described, and fulfilled in detail in the Old and New Testaments. F.F. Bruce says “There is no body of ancient literature in the world which enjoys such a wealth of good textual attestation as the New Testament.” , and everystudent.com says “In fact, we are more sure the New Testament remains as it was originally written by its writers, than we are sure of writings we attribute to Plato, or Aristotle, or Homer’s Iliad”.

I can’t provide evidence for every single thing in the entire Bible; if there were evidence, faith would be unneeded.

You don’t know how to know what the truth is…Well, I think a key thing to get done is get past the truth barrier of the Bible. Once you can prove the Bible’s inerrancy and infallibility, you should be able to accept the truths of the Bible.

Theopedia.com says “Inerrancy does not come without criticism.” In fact, criticism is what proves the inerrancy. You can’t have something be inerrant without being proven inerrant, and criticism is the #1 way to do that. Now, I know this will be long, but I had a short paper written on the inerrancy of the New Testament, though I may refer to it as the NT throughout the speech.

Many scholars today question the validity of Biblical accounts, supposedly based on the findings of archaeology. When the “discrepancies” are examined in detail, however it is found that the problems lie with the archaeology (i.e. misinterpretation of evidence, lack of evidence, or poor scholarship) and not with the Bible.

The Old Testament is a book, about half-filled with a history and law mixture. It’s historic evidence has been called into question countless times, and it just happens that the Old Testament has enough archaeological evidence to keep it validated. God seems to reveal these findings and proofs just when they’re needed (for example, the Great Flood being called into question and the possible finding of the Ark): which is a testimony of truth in and of itself. And, not only does the Old Testament externally support itself, but the New Testament, which has been validated, supports it as well, even mentioning the Great Flood.

But I’d like to prove the inerrancy of the New Testament, by looking first at archaeological proof for the Old Testament, talking about the Dead Sea Scrolls a little bit, and then concluding with a few quotes regarding the archaeological evidence.

First off, christiananswers.net says “The discovery of the Ebla archive in northern Syria in the 1970s has shown the Biblical writings concerning the Patriarchs to be viable. Documents written on clay tablets from around 2300 B.C. demonstrate that personal and place names in the Patriarchal accounts are genuine. The name “Canaan” was in use in Ebla, a name critics once said was not used at that time and was used incorrectly in the early chapters of the Bible.” The Ebla Archive, as stated in the quote, has verified the usage of the name “Canaan” around 2300 B.C., which Bible critics once said was not used then. If Canaan was not called Canaan or was not established until later, then that would prove that the Bible was made after Canaan was renamed, and thus it would prove that the Bible was recording past history, not present at the time it was written. Instead, since Canaan was used on the Ebla Archive, that proves that “Canaan” really was called “Canaan” when the Bible was written, thus proving that it is present, not past, history when it was written.

Secondly, christiananswers.net also says: “It was once claimed there was no Assyrian king named Sargon as recorded in Isaiah 20:1, because this name was not known in any other record. Then, Sargon’s palace was discovered in Khorsabad, Iraq. The very event mentioned in Isaiah 20, his capture of Ashdod, was recorded on the palace walls.” First response, how amazing that it had the Biblical history drawn on the walls! What an amazing find. Secondly, this is an amazing proof that cannot be ignored that the Bible is accurate, both historically and archaeologically.

John 17:17 says “Your word is truth”, speaking of God’s word. The New Testament, which has been proven accurate, says that His Word is truth. Now, God’s Word isn’t limited to the New Testament; not at all. He establishes so much in the Old Testament that, to disregard the Old Testament is to 1. Say that Jesus’ words in Matthew 4, when He was tempted by the devil, meant nothing. His quoting from Deuteronomy constantly meant nothing. He was quoting untrue Scriptures. The second thing that disregarding the Old Testament would do is it would nullify John 17:17, Matthew 24:37-38 and Matthew 12:40, which in the first verse says that His Word is pure, and in the other two recognizes the Flood and Jonah’s encounter with the Whale. So you cannot have the New Testament without the Old Testament; you cna’t have one without the other.

Secondly, let’s take a look at the Dead Sea Scrolls. If you don’t know what those are, like I didn’t, I’ll quote the story from deadseascrolls.org: “As the story goes, a shepherd of the Ta’amireh tribe left his flock of sheep and goats to search for a stray. Amid the crumbling limestone cliffs that line the northwestern rim of the Dead Sea, around the site of Qumran, he found a cave in the crevice of a steep rocky hillside. Intrigued, he cast a stone into the dark interior, only to be startled by the sound of breaking pots. This sound echoed around the world. For he had stumbled on the greatest find of the century, the Dead Sea Scrolls.”

The Dead Sea Scrolls were damaged and some completely unsalvagable, but they were an amazing find that took the world back to the ancient days, when David hid from Saul in those caves, and Jesus resisted the temptation of the devil. I quote again from deadseascrolls.org: “Among the Scrolls are partial or complete copies of every book in the Hebrew Bible (except the book of Esther). About a dozen copies of some of these holy books were written in ancient paleo-Hebrew (the script of the First Temple era, not the standard script of the time).” This proves also that the documents are valid Biblical documents, written back in those days when shepherds, kings, and others roamed those hills and cliffs, hiding the scrolls in the cave.

For my last point, I’d like to quote theopedia.com, regarding Old Testament historicy and reliability: “The authors of the OT present real history, about real people, and in real locations. Much of this has been proven through the finds of biblical archaeology. World-renowned archaeologist William F. Albright states, “There can be no doubt that archaeology has confirmed the substantial historicity of the Old Testament tradition (Albright, Archaeology and Religion of Israel, p. 176). Nelson Glueck adds that, “As a matter of fact… it may be stated categorically that no archaeological discovery has ever controverted a biblical reference. Scores of archaeological findings have been made which confirm in clear outline or exact detail statements in the Bible.”

Sorry for taking so long to get back to you on this! I really appreciate all of this, I guess I just kind of need FAITH to really become a Christian. I know the evidence, I’m just too easily swayed but atheists counter-arguments I suppose, if that makes sense. So it’s hard for me to trust, especially when there are voices shouting that the Bible is wrong (and quite convincing voices since there’s so many prominent athiests). I’m working on it though. I guess I’d just still ask for prayers because I need all the help I can get from God :-/ 🙂

Thanks!!
Your sister in Christ,
Julia

Well I know that is not God’s plan for your life so. Tell me if it comes and I will pray for you.

Always 😉

(this is later than the one below it) Psalm 77. Lately some of the darkness in my own heart has come back and it has been really tough. I’ve wanted to be strong for you Julia but all I can give you right now is weakness and tell you to look to Jesus. I thought a lot of this was past but the darkness and feeling like God is distant is back for me and the question that keeps popping up in my head is, “Will I never cease to have these times of darkness?” My heart is so spiritually cold right now. God, I’m trying to remember what you have done and been to me in the past, but right now that’s not my reality. I remember days of being joyful in You and days when my prayers came easily and every word of Your word seemed fresh. Why do You seem silent? Why am I so spiritually cold right now? But I know my life isn’t worth living without You, even if this darkness crushes me. To whom else shall I go? You are light and life even when I cannot see it for the darkness. Jesus, I can’t do this. Most of the time I can’t even remember to turn to You. I need You but I don’t desire You.
This is where I am right now and like you Julia I am still struggling to believe sometimes that He cares and this will end. I’m sorry I can’t give you very good answers right now and I haven’t been responding very quickly because my heart toward God is so cold right now. Read Psalm 77 it’s my cry right now. I’ll write back when I can. ~Anna

Anna,
I feel like I need to apologize. It was probably over a month ago that you sent this and I really have no excuse as to why I didn’t respond. Honestly, though, I wish I could give you advice. I wish I could help you out, but I can’t. So I didn’t respond and kind of left you hanging. I hope you’re doing better…and I’ll pray for you. If you do need/want to talk, please let me know. After all you’ve helped me through, its the least I could do. Sorry again 🙁
Love,
Julia

Hello. I know I haven’t been here recently…how’s it going?

I have Mono, and with Mono, you can get depression, this article helped me so much, I cant explain how much this is impacting me. Thank you. Thank you.