rebelling against low expectations
It’s time once again for America’s favorite comic strip: The Adventures of Jiffy N’ Lou! Brought to you courtesy of the late New Attitude Magazine, Joshua Harris, and The Rebelution. Click on image to enlarge.
Comment Section Starter Questions: What is your position when it comes to relationships? Out of curiosity, how many of you have read our older brother’s books, “I Kissed Dating Goodbye” and “Boy Meets Girl?”
Continue to Jiffy N’ Lou: Installment #104
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rebelling against low expectations
Whoa!!! *laugh* That’s pretty funny!
But unfortunately, it’s the truth. Though people to admit it, that’s exactly what does. It’s only to appease the “hormone rush”, and it only get us in trouble.
Great comic! I’m going to read them all! Thanks for highlighting these treasures, guys!
Read ’em both, loved ’em. Agreed with them.
And that comic is HILARIOUS, unfortunately it’s true…
Marshall
I’ve read both books. Actually, I’ve read IKDG 9 or 10 times.
My position: After I initially read IKDG when it first came out, I got the idea in my head that dating was something inherently bad, but I don’t hold that position anymore. Dating ought to be intentional, and it ought to be centered on God’s will and the other person’s best interest, and it ought to be backed up with commitment–you shouldn’t be shopping before you can buy. But dating in itself is not really the problem (which I think is what Josh said, but which I missed at the time).
Um, I think I wasn’t very clear there. I totally agree with both Josh’s books, but I think I misinterpreted him and took his ideas too far originally. So I have backed off from that. But I love the books and totally support the principles he lays out.
J: I completely understand what you mean. In the introduction to “I Kissed Dating Goodbye” and in Chapter 2 of “Boy Meets Girl,” Josh explains that dating vs. courtship really isn’t the point. The terms aren’t important, it’s about purposeful relationships, God-honoring standards, and appropriate timing.
I appreciate hearing that you’ve realized where you misread Josh’s books, because way too many people misread them and then never figure it out.[NOTE: Rebelutionaries, always read the book’s introduction. Always.]
I read “I Kissed Dating Goodbye” and totally agreed with it. I have yet to read “Boy Meets Girl”, though.
That comic is so sad because that is reality of many, many guy/girl relationships. Its tragic, because the repercussions of these sort of situations have shockwaved into the culture. Because guys have begun to value girls by what the girls can give them, girls now view themselves as valuable only if they are “attractive enough”. They do anything to become that way (i.e. anorexia, plastic surgery, etc.), including dressing immodestly, which ends up encouraging the guys to continue looking at the girl on the outside…its a circle that never ends.
And I know, I just wrote a 100+ word post on a comic strip and am feeling rather ridiculous….time for me to get back to school.
Don’t worry, Hannah. The whole point of the Jiffy N’ Lou comics, and the reason why we include them on The Rebelution, is because things can be funny and substantive, at the same time. Your comment was right on.
Oh, and if you hadn’t noticed: The Rebelution now links to you.
Thanks a lot!
I have read “I Kissed Dating Goodbye” and parts of “Boy Meets Girl”. They were both excellent. When it comes to relationships it really is what is in the heart that matters. When it comes down to the point of dating/courting, well, I am not sure yet…lol…my bro is doing half dating half courting and it is going very well. I deff. would tend to go with courting though.
I have read both of your brother’s books. My position when it comes to relationships is that dating is just a word. What is most important is your motive. Like the comic said, I don’t want to date just as a casual thing. Dating is a serious minded, carefully entered relationship.
Abby: I can’t help but ask, “What does it look like to half-date and half-court? What are the distinctions between dating and courting that you see, and which characteristics of each has your brother adopted?”
You’ve really piqued my curiosity. 🙂
I think this was my favorite of the three installments you’ve posted so far…
I’ve read the first book. It was very good.
I haven’t read either of them… I know my dad and youth leaders have though, and they agreed with them. Maybe when my school work load slows down a little (if that is possible lol) I will read them.
I havent read “I kissed dating goodbye” but I have heard so much about it and watched a video that your brother spoke about the book on. It was great, an excellent concept that I hope more teens think about and very seriously.
I have read both books…and agree with both of them whole heartedly. I guess I still have a lot of questions though about dating. Do you think you guys could ever do a post on relationships and dating or courting?
Don’t worry, Lauren. The issue will undoubtedly be addressed. To help us help you, what sort of questions do you have?
Brett: It means that they aren�t as �strict� so to say as most people in courting relationships are but then they are not for the whole dating relationship. They spend most of the time with my family or her family. But maybe every other week when my bro comes up from AL they will go out on dates by themselves (which is not exactly allowed in most of the courting scenarios that I have seen, maybe you have seen diff.). So yah, it is sort-of in-between. Does it make sense?lol
Abby: Yeah, I completely understand what you mean. I have seen quite a variety of courtship “methods,” so that description was not new to me. Thanks for explaining!
I haven’t read either. 😀 But I can guarantee that I agree with him on everything – if not being more conservative! 😀 I think courtship is the best model,where you get together as families (besides, what can you talk about when on single dates? 😀 ).
Hey Brett,
I will email you with the questions, they are somewhat personal and maybe a little long for a comment section…=)
Lauren
I haven´t read “I kissed dating goodbye” yet but my mom got it for me and I´m gonna read it next year for school if not earlier. The comic is right, honesty is the best policy in a relationship, but you need to have good intentions and a good and pure heart!
I’ve read IKDG, but not BMG. I really want to though. I’m really late with this comment.
I started dating an 18 y/o guy when I was 18 and I wasn’t a Christian but he was. One of the first times we were alone I started in on him in the way I thought all guys liked. He stopped me in my tracks and said “I want you to know I’m a virgin and I plan on staying that way til I’m married”. I thought, oh good, I don’t have to ‘perform’ for this guy. I soon became a Christian too and three years later I married that guy and he kept his word. We’ve had 12 years so far of marriage and hope to teach our children to stick to their convictions too. It makes such a huge difference to the marriage.
I’ve read I Kissed Dating Goodbye, and I love it!! I’m only 16 and I’m so glad I could learn about the right way to go about this before I did anything stupid.
I Kissed Dating Goodbye is a very good, but also convicting book.
I have also read “I Kissed Dating Goodbye” and “Boy Meets Girl,” and I think that those books are very important for teenagers to read. It is so comforting to know that there are others out there who believe in courtship and are waiting for God’s plan for them. I had made the choice to not date several years ago, but it has been an uphill battle sometimes. Even though I am only almost sixteen, teens my age are almost mocking when I tell them I don’t date. The world always looks at you strangely when you are different. But that’s okay, because I’d rather wait till the man God wants for me comes into my life, than rush headfirst into marriage with the wrong guy. anyway, aside from my bunny trail, this was a great comic. thank you for taking the time to put it in here. 🙂 God bless!!!!
Sadly, that comic was so real that I just couldn’t laugh.
I have read “I kissed Dating Goodbye” before. But as I’m only 15 I did not read “Boy meets Girl”. Having been homeschooled and my socialization is regulated, I am glad to say I do not have to battle with the opinions and taunts of peers. But I can see the results of this type of dating all around me. It has even crept into the church. I just wish more people could be helped because I’m sure that quite a few people go along with it just because everyone else does it and they never stopped to think about it. Well God bless your ministry.
I read and absolutely LOVED “I Kissed Dating Goodbye” and “Boy Meets Girl”.
(oh, and I am the identical twin of the other Gruber girl one post previous) “Boy Meets Girl” was aimed more at people ready for courtship… but it’ll be know how to procede when I get to the age of marriageability (I don’t think that’s a real word, but oh well…)
Dating is such a tragic thing… if we are so totally focused on our bf or gf and that relationship, we can’t be totally focused on God and our relationship w/Him. And if all of our time is consumed by bf or gf, we don’t have time for God, a ministry or church, or preparing ourselves for adulthood and whatever God has for our future.
Lisa: homeschooling is awesome, isn’t it? :c)
We homeschool now, but last year, even at a Christian high school, the pitiful results of dating are painfully evident. Girls would hide out in the locker rooms to avoid being asked out on a date to banquets and stuff by a guy they didnt like, peoples’ feelings were constantly being hurt, and dating couples broke up and got back together left and right. It’s was like one long and painful emotional roller coaster for them.
Even though it sometimes felt a little awkward to know everyone thought we were weird for not dating, I feel so blessed I was and am being spared the pains of dating
By the way… great comic (my compliments to the artist)! painfully true.
~Elisabeth J. Gruber
I have read ‘I Kissed Datong Goodbye” but haven’t gotten to read “Boy Meets Girl”
Too true. I emailed this to a few of my friends.
Boy meets girl is an excellent book. I’m only 13, but I’m psyched for when I get older to start courtship. I’m so I glad I know about ‘cuz I was NOT looking forward to dating.
Ouch!
My parents said, “courting is the way to go” I may not want to, but I trust them.
I’ve read both books (and reads them every year to be constantly reminded). They’re really GREAT and I’m glad I read them early on my teen years.
In relationships with the opposite sex, I really agree with your brother that it’s best to just have a healthy brotherly relationship with them. It’s easier to be who you are when there aren’t any “romantic tugging” within the relationship. Song of Solomon says do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires. I believe that entering a romantic relationship can wait. Let’s just let God do the maneuvering of our life–romantic especially. It’s just sad that many people actually think that the sole purpose of their life is to find their “soul mate.” I could only shake my head in disbelief.
Being single is really precious and I’m thankful for it. I think it’s one of God’s best gift ever! I really love God’s gift of singleness that I actually asked God if I can just be single for the rest of my life. But of course, married or single for life, His will be done. =)
Teens, love being single! =) Don’t let people pressure you. To be single is amazing!
Hey Alex and Brett,
I just wanted to tell you how much I love these little comics! I’m in the middle of reading your book and I really like it! I’ll tell you what I think once I’ve finished and thought about it!
Thanks
Mia
lol! these comics are very good, but I do believe I’ve gotten more out of the comments then the actual comics themselves! It’s very encouraging to see that there are so many other christian teenagers out there.
I have not read IKDG, but I’ve read Boy Meets Girl, and I agree very much with y’all’s older brother. I prefer not to say “dating” or “courting”, because neither term really describes the type of relationship I’m used to. Most of the young couples I know grew up knowing each other, started liking each other romantically when they were about 13, and became better and better friends until they eventually fell in love and married. a few of them married after meeting at college and becoming very good friends first. In fact, my cousin met his wife at PHC and they are now happily married with a baby on the way. I personally think that until we’re totally ready for a commitment, we need to work on just being friends. I personally am not ready to have a “boyfriend”, or anything of the sort. I believe that if you don’t think you could end up marrying the person who wants to be your bf/gf, there’s no point in pursuing a relationship that will only end up in broken hearts and regret for ever entering the relationship in the first place. I also have a few questions about that sort of thing; I no longer have a big bro. to ask that sort of stuff. I’ll e-mail with the other questions
Love in Christ,
Stephanie
These comics are great! This one is hilarious!! Yet very sobering.
I read the books, they are amazing and life changing. They have been big in helping to shape my convictions and standards for relationships, even tho’ I have never dated/courted…..yet :)!! I’ve read IKDG a bunch of times and I often recommend it to friends. Keep up the good work Bret and Alex. God bless you! Psalm 84:11!!!
Ok, read IKDG (I just finished it two days ago) and am now in the middle of BMG. I absolutely loved and agreed with IKDG wholeheartedly, and BMG is very good, even though it doesn’t apply to my situation as of yet. But, yeah, IKDG really changed my perspective. Before, my mind knew that courting/dating or whatever term you want to give it, that is, purposeful, God-honoring relationships were the way to go, but I was kind of jealous of “recreational dating”. Now I’m totally into courting/dating/w.t.y.w.t.g.i. 😀
So, that’s the main gist if it, sorry to rattle on. Both books are wonderful, highly recommended to all you random folks who might read this post!
Perfect! Now if only my friends male/female could all see this.
That is funny! Also, I have to say, that type of honesty isn’t the best policy. He acts very, I’m not sure what the word is, conceited? That is what happens in relationships though, even if it is in a comic, it happens in real life. I like the girl. 🙂 I would’ve probably smacked a guy if he said that to me. Not trying to be violent though. 🙂
I love the comic… very funny. On a more serious note, I have read the books “I kissed dating goodbye” and “Boy meets Girl”. I really loved ‘Boy meets Girl’, although I wasn’t entirely sold on ‘I kissed dating goodbye’. I’m not sure entirely if I agree 100% with courtship, but I do like, and plan to put into practice someday, the idea of only committing to long-term relationships (not just flings) and of putting the other person before yourself, and encouraging each other in your Godly walks, which in my opinion is the main idea of ‘courtship’.
lol I laughed out loud. The sad thing is, its 100% true, for both guys and girls. The world has taken God’s perfect and pure relationship between men and women and has twisted it to just have a good time in your flesh, then totally discard the person for more lustful wants.
Waiting for your future spouse is the way to go!!! I write letters to my future husband all of the time to give as a gift after we’re married. =)
Thanks so much for sharing this!!
I read I kissed Dating Goodbye and loved it! I grew up being told not to date by my dad since I was like 9 so I was very familiar with the idea but when I actually read the book it went so much deeper and really, truely made me understand WHY I wasn’t going to date. It brought it so alive for me. I wanted to give the book to everyone I knew! (Personally, THAT should be a book that Christian school kids go through. In Junior High. I’d love it in my school.)
As for my position, I believe that one should date/court only when they are beginning to look for their future spouse. And that it should be not so much in “dates” in the current meaning of the word, but rather at church things, meeting family, ect.
My mom borrowed the book “I kissed dating goodbye” from her school library and I got to read it. The comic sure backs up what the book says!
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